Group Analytic Contexts, Issue 77, September 2017

16 Group-Analytic Society International - Contexts
her parents, she was free to enjoy her babies without being reminded
of her own unwelcoming entrance into the world. Unconsciously this
situation was to have a profound effect. It was as though my sisters
were her real daughters to later become her allies in an imaginary war
against my father and me. I recall her often saying, “Teresa is the only
child my parents and your father care about”.
Living with Trauma
In the aftermath of trauma families and groups often draw into a tight
circle with little differentiation between members. A form of pseudo
mutuality develops in which everyone is expected to hold the same
beliefs and difference cannot be tolerated. 3 According to groupanalytic
colleague, Yael Doron, the story of the Tower of Babel
appears in the book of Genesis immediately after the story of Noah’s
flood for a reason. Building the Tower arose out of the need to hold
together, to have a common voice after the massive trauma of the
flood. 4
In New Zealand our very unusual surname, von Sommaruga,
marked us out as different. Few people understood where the von
Sommarugas had come from and few were willing to try to pronounce
the name. Without extended family around to explain what this name
meant, it was a cause for embarrassment. It was particularly tough for
my sisters who had no memories of people or places in Europe. 5 I too
struggled with this name and constantly wondered what led both our
parents to see things so differently from the parents of our friends.
“Why were marching bands something to fear rather than enjoy?” for
example. As Göran Rosenberg explains, “You can look forward only
if the world looks backward and remembers where you come from,
and sees the paths you pursue, and understands why you’re still
living”. 6 As this perspective was not available in NZ then, my
3
Wynne, L., (1984). ‘The Epigenesis of Relational Systems: A Model
for Understanding Family Development’, Family Process 23 3.
4
Doron, Y., (2016). ‘The Tower of Babel: Massification, Individuality
and Empathy in Large Societies and in Small Groups’, Group
Analysis, June 2016; vol. 49, 2: pp. 124-133
5
Beagelhole, A., (1990). Facing the Past: Looking Back at Refugee
Childhood in New Zealand, 1940s – 1960s. Wellington: Allen and
Unwin.
6
Rosenberg, G., (2015). A Brief Stop on the Road from Auschwitz.
London: Granta.