WE SCREWED UP!For reasons that we still cannot understand, ourCrossword puzzle in the March edition was incorrect.The correct one (along with the answers) are below.We are truly sorry for the error and hope that our editor is smartenough to make sure it does not happen again.44April 2021
Adam and Eve... and Their DogBy: Vicki Wentz / Vicki’s VoiceMen and women - the never-ending game.The mystery…the temptress and thetempted…the Adam and the Eve…the one whocan dress for a wedding in a minute and the onewho starts laying out“ensembles” the day aftersomeone’s proposal isannounced.Two random episodes:Sitting outside arestaurant, after leavingthe smoky bar to get somefresh air. (Who knewbars were still smoky? Ithought the only placeanybody in the countrycould sneak a Camelnow was the basement ofan abandoned tobacco warehouse in Georgia.)People who smoke, in my humble opinion, are nuts, not to mentionsmelly, but I don’t believe in legislating EVERYTHING IN THEUNIVERSE from leaf-blowers to car seats – don’t you have to ride in acar seat until you’re, like, twenty-three now?And if somebody wants to light up, it’s his decision, bless his overtaxedheart – but back to my tale.So, I’m sitting on a little stone wall, and about ten feet away aretwo girls and a guy, sipping drinks and talking earnestly. One girl hadbroken up with her boyfriend “because, God, he is SO not ready tocommit, you know? I mean, I’m like ready to get married and havekids, and he’s all like ‘What?’ and I just said, God, forget it.”The other girl says, “Yeah, he doesn’t sound real mature, but you’realready a Mom. You have Toby!”The first girl giggles, “Yeah, Toby’s my baby! Same thing!” (Umm…Fine. Whatever.)But, the second girl goes on, “No, honestly, I truly believe, like,walking a dog is the same as, like, changing a diaper, really. WhenDave walks Chester, I think that totally shows he’s ready to take care ofa baby, you know?”Now, Dave (who has wisely stayed quiet so far) snorts involuntarilyinto his beer and almost needs CPR.This is the younger generation? They think walking a dog is the sameas changing a diaper, which is also, of course, the main prerequisite forbecoming a parent?I recently visited my son and the new baby. Robby answered the door,his eyes wide as if he’d been hit with a stun gun.Behind him, Mommy was bouncing the crying baby, laundry waspiled on the couch, baby equipment had overtaken the dining room,and dishes, bottles and pots covered the kitchen counters.His first words to me were not “Hello” or “Hey, Mom”, but “HOW DOPEOPLE DO THIS?!”As I remember that, I myself, snort involuntarily and almost fall offthe little stone wall!The second male-female encounter involved our neighbors, a couplewith three young adult kids, a mortgage, and a great sense of humor.They came by last night and we talked in the driveway for a few minutes.The wife then said, “Come on, Pooh (not his real name) youpromised we’d just stopfor a minute and thentake our walk.”Pooh looked at me,mystified. “Can youbelieve it? The kids areout, the house is empty. Isay, ‘Snugglebunny (nother real name either) weneed some quality time.’”He wiggles hiseyebrows. “And she wantsto take a walk!” Shesmacks him playfully on the arm.Always thinking outside the box, I say, “Why don’t you split thedifference and run really hard from here back home and up to yourbedroom, and then…uh…burn some additional calories for the nextfew hours?”She smacks me on the arm, too, and off they go, still teasingcontentedly after 25 years.As I watch them go, I wonder when it was that they realized changinga diaper wasn’t all there was to parenthood. And, I notice, also, that theydon’t have a dog.Vicki Wentz is a writer, teacher and speaker living in NorthCarolina. Readers may contact her - and order her new children’sbook! - by visiting her website at www.vickiwentz.com.What DoYou Think?Do you agree with ourcolumnists? Did anyone getyou angry, make you thinkor simply put a smile onyour face? Please tell us byforwarding your comments,thoughts or suggestions toPublisher Dan at: dan@thevegasvoice.net.45
Change language