all aboard! Join the Ferry Park Crew Ferry Park is hiring front of house staff for The Lookout and Exit Zero Ferry Station! Check out www.visitferrypark.com/jobs for requirements and to apply Page 18 EXIT ZERO December 15, 2022 Year’s Eve-Eve (December 30, if you’re bad with calendars) with Jerry Kolber, Goose to my Maverick, because I clearly look much more like Tom Cruise than he does. I’m finishing up my first year with Jerry, the sole survivor of the four partners I began the year with, like Squid Game if I was the squid and had any idea what that show was about because I never watched it but this analogy seems apt based on what I’ve gleaned from the internet. I’ll gush more in my end-of-the-year column, but Jerry is a top-flight musical partner and even better dude. My part-time female vocalist could learn a lot from him. After that, my next open-tothe-public gig isn’t until February 4 at Mudhen in Wildwood. I’m telling you now because Exit Zero goes on hiatus after December 29 and returns February 9. My homies at WCFA 101.5 outdid themselves this week for the Terry O’Brien Delivery Block. At the stroke of 7am I was slapped in the face in the best way possible with REM’s “Wolves, Lower,” an all-time alternative banger that no one’s ever heard. A few hours later it was “Tongue Like a Knife” from Squeeze’s sublime Play album. I’m telling you, line up Play on your YouTube or Spotify or whatever you have and settle in for an hour of incredible music. Warning: You WILL get horny. But more than that, I was stunned and amazed by the volume and quality of incredible New Wave-era Christmas songs that filled the remaining three hours and 50 minutes. I couldn’t name two of them if you put a gun to my head, but they were uniformly awesome. As I dropped off magazines at the MVC in North Cape May Thursday morning, I was met not with the usual stern-faced security guards keeping the building safe from people who haven’t memorized their VINs, but rather with the smiling visage of Eddie Castegnetta. And really, aside from my wife waking me up with a smooch and an “I love you”, there are very few other ways I’d rather greet a Thursday morning. (Eddie hosts a fantastic oldies show on WCFA and is just as nice in-person as he sounds on the radio. Mary Ann is a lucky lady.) Cape Harbor Shell’s restroom was spotless, as usual, around 8am Thursday morning, but the door is getting a little sticky, I really had to pull to shut it. Let’s work on that for next week, shall we? (Also, Andrew Fiocca, I call lots of people “big fella” when I can’t think of anything clever to say. You look fantastic.) Dallas Cowboys LB (short for linebacker for all you non-sports nerds) Micah Parsons recently expressed a normal, unvarnished thought on Twitter, for which he was excoriated by the Woke Mob for not exercising perfect GroupThink. As an American, this troubles me greatly. As an Eagles fan, I say DRAG HIM! Thanks to the wonders of technology, I was able to audition for and be rejected by The Voice within minutes instead of driving two hours to Philly, waiting in a room for six hours, THEN being rejected by The Voice followed by the drive home. It’s tough being an unrecognized vocal genius. Employee Christmas Party of the Week: We’re meeting at self checkout aisle 7 at the Acme on Christmas Eve at 9. Can’t wait to see who my Secret Santa is. I watched Amsterdam on HBO. I’m still trying to figure out if it was any good, but, being a David O. Russell film, it was never boring. Denzel Washington’s son is really growing on me. (He and Robert Pattinson were a great onscreen duo in the otherwise indecipherable TENET.) That’s all for this week. Next week I’ll down half a bottle of Jack Daniels before I write and, while the column may not be much better, at least I won’t remember it. ’Til next week, don’t get caught in The Undertow.
December 15, 2022 EXIT ZERO Page 19
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