Tybee Breeze

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May of ‘07 will go down in Tybee history as the month of the idiot invasion. Even though I can’t explain it, I do know the warning signs of a pending moron attack. Proms and graduation. Now, don’t get me wrong. It’s generally not the students who show the most behind. No. It’s that fringe group of eighth grade dropouts who seem to draw the most attention. For some reason, they feel the need to be there for “their” prom, even though they haven’t seen the inside of a classroom since the Clinton administration. 14 Tybee Breeze These mutants are what law enforcement professionals refer to as “cop magnets.” They are easy to spot. They walk down the middle of a busy street, no shirt, no shoes, refusing to move out of the way of traffic. They are almost always in need of a bath, are intoxicated, and wear their pants a full foot and a half below the waistband of their underwear. And good God, their breath! When a police officer gives them the once over, the response is usually the same: As they stagger and spill beer from a bright red (they always use red) to-go cup, the reaction is the same: “What are you looking at?” At this time Ole Slo would like to pass on a piece of unsolicited advice to these oxygen thieves: It’s not a good idea to refer to the officer as a MF, especially if you have just tossed your hot beer all over his uniform. And further, never try to shake hands with the arresting officer. It is not a social engagement. I can remember when I was on the Tybee PD (back in the dark ages) and when a citizen called for police assistance, the dispatch sounded something like this: John, how ‘bout swing by Miss Mollie’s house, got some kinda commotion going on over there. Seems the neighbor’s dog, Booger, got his head stuck in the hole in the fence again. Now, I’m not trying to belittle the emergent nature of Booger’s predicament, but, back in those days, this was about the most exciting police call an officer could get. Neighbors would gather round trying to calm little Booger down. It wouldn’t be unusual for a neighbor lady to place a bowl of water under the puppy’s nose, just in case he was thirsty. It’s different now. Before we close, I need your help. Seems there are still some folks out there who don’t know that it’s cole slaw. It can be cold too, but it’s still cole slaw. Help me spread the word. (Speaking of food, the pickled eggs at Benny’s are out of this world.)
2007 Turtle Trot & Celebration The Tybee Island Turtle Trot is more successful every year. Benefiting the Sea Turtle Project at the Tybee Marine Science Center, participants come from around the country to run in Georgia’s only beach run. This year, 136 runners enjoyed the race. Conditions were different for the 2007 event. The race has traditionally been held in the morning. Area high tides made the beach softer for the run, rather than at low tide. A few local runners indulged in a pit stop at an area bar to refresh themselves to finish the 5K. Tammy Smith, longtime sea turtle volunteer, organized this annual event in conjunction with activities offered at the Science Center, such as face painting, beach walks and a sand turtle building contest. A competition was held at local schools for the design of the race T-shirt. The artwork honors went to a 5 th grade student at May by Jessica Farthing TIMC Sea Turtle Project Volunteer Howard Elementary for his designs of children on the back of a sea turtle. For the female division, first place went to Patty Onorato, with Nikki Josey second and Lisa Oakes third. The winner of the male division was Richard LeVesseur. Daniel H. Hall, Jr. was in second place and third went to John Burling. The Tybee Island Sea Turtle Project monitors the beach every summer for sea turtle activity. Opportunities to volunteer are always available. For more information on the Tybee Island Sea Turtle Project, please visit the Tybee Island Marine Science Center on the Strand or contact Heather Kozak, Project Coordinator at (912)786-5917, hkozak@tybeemsc.org or visit the website at www.tybeemsc.org. Tybee Breeze 15
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Page 43 and 44: 1ST A A T ANNUAL NNUAL TTYBEE T YBE
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