The Drama of the Gifted Child (The Search for the True Self)

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systematic, clarifying, helpful, and committed solely to the truth. How should they know this when their teachers refuse to find out anything about it because this access to childhood fills them with fear? It is the fear of one's own history, of the truth of the naked facts that can be brought to light by this therapy. Sigmund Freud banished this fear by denying the possibility of a verifiable access to childhood reality and restricting the analyst's work to the field of the patients' fantasies. The Swiss therapist J. Konrad Stettbacher has described the therapy he developed, and which I tested on myself, in a work entitled Wenn Leiden einen Sinn haben soll ("If Suffering Is to Have a Meaning"). This therapy can enable many people to approach their childhoods step by step and to assimilate the knowledge they have banished. With the knowledge of one's own history, susceptibility to such irrational help as ideologies, speculations, and sacrosanct lies vanishes because blindness is no longer required as a protection from fear. Someone who has faced facts need no longer fear reality nor flee from it. This completely cuts the ground from under the power of pedagogy and of the psychoanalytical and philosophical speculations that conceal reality. It must give way to what is transparent and verifiable. ALICE MILLER 1990 Translated by Leila Vennewitz
Preface We live in a culture that encourages us not to take our own suffering seriously, but rather to make light of it or even to laugh about it. What is more, this attitude is regarded as a virtue, and many people—of whom I used to be one—are proud of their lack of sensitivity toward their own fate and particularly toward their fate as a child. I have tried to demonstrate in my books why the disastrous belief that this attitude is a desirable one has been held so tenaciously and to point out the tragic conditions it helps to conceal. Again and again, readers from a number of countries have told me with great relief that after reading The Drama of the Gifted Child, they felt for the first time in their life something approaching sympathy for the neglected, abused, or even battered child they had been once. They say they now have more self-respect than before and are better able to recognize their needs and feelings. "It was my life you were describing in your book; how could you have known?" I am often asked. How could I have known? Today I do not find it hard to answer this question. Today I know that it was not the books I read, it was not my teachers or my study of philosophy, nor was it my training to become a psychoanalyst that provided me with this knowledge. On the contrary, all of these together, with their mystifying conxi
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Page 6 and 7: A previous version of chapter 1 app
Page 9 and 10: Vantage Point 1990 Almost ten years
Page 11: Although, understandably enough, I
Page 15 and 16: of child abuse. Had just one person
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Page 28 and 29: yet, for many people the truth is s
Page 30 and 31: ing, general attitudes, these peopl
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Page 46 and 47: The Psychoanalyst's Situation It is
Page 48 and 49: e found beyond the deep ambivalence
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Page 54 and 55: Chapter 2 Depression and Grandiosit
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ceptional capacity for suffering. P
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neighborhood. They therefore made s
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is not allowed to be what he really
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3. Continuous performance of outsta
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an absolutely essential adaptation
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eader's letter in which the tragic
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neither the grandiose nor the depre
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can be experienced, insight and ass
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(holding) empathic environment. Win
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to formulate connections that the p
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strate to the patient that "his hop
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that resist this adaptation. In old
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Points of Contact with Some Theorie
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Chapter 3 The Vicious Circle of Con
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finished his ice cream, he gave the
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een caught at night outside the loc
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children are aware of this situatio
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about his own childhood, which he d
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ment of their children. What are we
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If we want to avoid the unconscious
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ference feelings and his own childi
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• The hope that with this birth t
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self—to show himself to the world
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PERPETUATION OF CONTEMPT IN PERVERS
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horrified eyes, and this clearly em
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pulses, for he does not allow the c
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dramas, nor pangs of conscience whe
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"the others," classify, group, and
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sexual satisfactions, whereas the c
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puberty also had to live out his fa
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the 21st of January to the 5th of J
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through experience, not merely corr
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ecause of their very nature, inacce
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course of analysis it can then be s
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flicts had absolutely no effect, th
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not so clever and quick (for instan
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that their teacher once had and was
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the history of his childhood and th
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Works Cited Abraham, K. 1960 (orig.
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Index abandonment, 10-14, 79 Abraha
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The Drama of the Gifted Child (The Search for the True Self)

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