The laughable stories collected by Mâr Gregory John Bar Hebræ

STORIES OF MISERS. I 1
5
certain man saying to a shopman, "My mother saith
"to thee, 'Take back this loaf and give me a smaller
"one, but give me some carrots besides.'"
CCCCXLIV. A certain butcher once, when he had
no work in the city, went out to one of the villages,
and bought a sheep* and killed it; and he skinned it
as if he were about to sell it. And having waited from
morning until evening and nothing had been bought,
a certain old woman came to him with a basket of
bran and said unto him, "Give me some flesh for this
"bran, only let it be from a fatty part." Then the
butcher being enraged said, "May the village perish in
"which flesh can be bought for bran." The old woman
said to him, "Woe is me, for thou art a man of the
"city with heavy teeth; wilt thou only sell flesh for
"date-stones.'*" And it came to pass that when the
butcher heard that people could buy meat there with
date-stones, he took his dead beast and went back to
the
city.
CCCCXLV. Another man in going through a certain
city wanted some fine wheat flour, and when he asked
where it could be bought they said to him, "Here
"thou wilt only find fine wheat flour at the scent mer-
"chants', who sell it for [laying upon] sores."
CCCCXLVI. Another miser said to a dealer, "Give
"me a piece of cheese for a halfpenny," and the dealer
said to him, "For a halfpenny all that thou wilt get
"of the cheese is a sniff of it."
CCCCXLVII. When a traveller visited a certain
miser he said to his handmaiden, "Make ready the
"sweetmeats that our guest may eat." And she said
to him, "We have no honey," and he said to her,
"Prepare the silk covered couch for him to recline