The laughable stories collected by Mâr Gregory John Bar Hebræ

STORIES OF CLOWNS AND SIMPLETONS.
I 5 I
DC. Another simpleton when praying said, "O my
"Lord, give me five thousand pieces of silver, so that
"I may give one thousand of them to the poor; and
"if it be that Thou art not certain [about me] give
"me four thousand and. do Thou Thyself give the
"other thousand with Thine Own hands into theirs."
DCI. Another silly man having gone on a journey
to carry on his trade wrote to his father, saying, "I
"have been ill with a very grievous sickness, and if
"any one else had been in my place he would not
"have been able to live." And his father made him
answer, saying, " Believe me, my son, if thou hadst died
"thou wouldst have grieved me sadly, and I would
"never have spoken to thee again in the whole course
"of my life."
DCII. Another simpleton on being asked what he
had learned at school replied, "Arithmetic;" whereupon
some people said to him, "If four pieces of silver be
"divided equally among three men, how much will each
"receive.''" And he said, "Two of them will receive
"two pieces of silver each, so that there will be twice
"two pieces of silver for the three of them."
DCIII.
Another silly man was carrying on his shoulder
a little boy dressed in a red gown, and forgetting all
about his being there, he began to ask the folk, saying,
"Who hath seen a boy dressed in a red gown?"
And when it was said to him, " Peradventure it is this
"boy who is on thy shoulder," and he had lifted up
his head and seen him, he struck him, saying, "O son
"of adultery, how many times have I told thee that
"when I am carrying thee thou art not to go away
"from me?"
DCIV. Another simpleton was sitting in a boat on