Issue #20 (2011) PDF - myweb - Long Island University

Mr. Tate beat her after that. He beat Colleen so bad that she didn‘t show for weeks at
school. The school would call her house, but Mrs. Tate just said that Colleen had the
mononucleosis. Said she wouldn‘t be in school for a month. Mr. Tate wouldn‘t let us see each
other, either. I‘d call the house, but at the sound of my voice, the Tates would hang up. I didn‘t
know when I would see her again and decided to just go there one night.
I road my bike there. Past Fischers farm and the lake. The cold air stung my ears and my
jacket whipped tight against my arms. It was for her, I thought, I had to ride for her. I had to make
sure she was alright. The lone streetlights gave me just enough light to get to her, but all around me
were shadows. Ahead of me, I could see the outline of their house, the black shutters on the dark
grey sidin‘ looked like eyes and the doorway was an opened, scared mouth, callin‘ me. I pedaled
faster.
I walked my bike around the back of the property and stared up at Colleen‘s window.
Behind me off in the distance the animals lay resting, the land was still and I was suddenly aware of
the fear beatin‘ in my ears. I searched around on the ground for a stick, or somethin‘ small to throw.
When I found one, I lifted my eyes up to her window to take aim.
Colleen was already there, starin‘ down at me in the dark. Her blonde hair looked white, the
ends waved in the cold breeze. Her skin looked blue in the dark and her eyes were now as black as
holes. She caught me so off guard, I fell back on the ground, into the soft wet earth. Catchin‘ my
breath, I got up, ran to the drainpipe and climbed my way up to her window. She grabbed my arms
and helped me into her room.
Seein‘ her now in the dark, she wasn‘t like I left her a month back. I could see violet circles
under her eyes, her arms were all spotted with bruises and scrapes. Colleen stood there just starin‘ at
me and I didn‘t know what to say. Nothin‘ would come out my mouth except a sob and I pulled her
into me, huggin‘ her close, smellin‘ her damp hair. Her arms wrapped around me, too, but with little
strength. This was not my Colleen anymore. They‘d hurt her real bad. She was changed and inside
me something changed, too. As I was holdin‘ her there, I swore I heard the rushin‘ out of blood,
only it was my own blood, hot as fire and coursin‘ through my veins.
I said her name. I asked her what I could do. I asked her what I could do to make her not
feel this way anymore. And that‘s when she said it. She took the words from inside my head and
made them real.
―Kill them,‖ she whispered. Her breath cut out in sharp points. I looked down at her hands
as I held them. One of her thumbnails was ripped off. My eyes met hers and I took my hand,
smoothin‘ back her white hair. My thumb edged along her cheek, feelin‘ the roughness of her scar
and I pulled her face to mine. Kissin‘ her right eye, I leaned into her ear.
―Alright,‖ I whispered back. My breath drew out, heavier, longer. ―Alright.‖
I had to kill them. In the dark, blood is black and thick and it swims in your mind with the
smell of salt. I didn‘t stay in the room there with them. I ran down the hall to Colleen‘s room, where
I told her to wait for me. As I burst through the door, the light was off, her suitcase was still on the
bed and the window was still open. Outside, behind the waving white curtains, I saw the stables, the
oaks were black staunch figures on both sides and the moon was shinin‘ directly overhead. I ran to
the window and looked out, just to be sure I understood what I was seein‘. The stable door was
open.
I ran out her room, past the ghosts of Mr. and Mrs. Tate, flew down the stairs, through the
greasy kitchen and out the back door. My lungs heaved with sadness and fear at what I‘d just done
and I wanted to hold her so bad. My feet rustled through the grass, picking up pace as I drew closer
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