Roundabout Papers - Penn State University

Thackeraypose that ogres have ceased to exist. We all know ogres.Their caverns are round us, and about us. There are thecastles of several ogres within a mile of the spot whereI write. I think some of them suspect I am an ogremyself. I am not: but I know they are. I visit them. Idon’t mean to say that they take a cold roast prince outof the cupboard, and have a cannibal feast before me.But I see the bones lying about the roads to their houses,and in the areas and gardens. Politeness, of course, preventsme from making any remarks; but I know themwell enough. One of the ways to know ‘em is to watchthe scared looks of the ogres’ wives and children. Theylead an awful life. They are present at dreadful cruelties.In their excesses those ogres will stab about, andkill not only strangers who happen to call in and ask anight’s lodging, but they will outrage, murder, and chopup their own kin. We all know ogres, I say, and havebeen in their dens often. It is not necessary that ogreswho ask you to dine should offer their guests the peculiardish which they like. They cannot always get a TomThumb family. They eat mutton and beef too; and I daresay even go out to tea, and invite you to drink it. But Itell you there are numbers of them going about in theworld. And now you have my word for it, and this littlehint, it is quite curious what an interest society may bemade to have for you, by your determining to find outthe ogres you meet there.What does the man mean? says Mrs. Downright, towhom a joke is a very grave thing. I mean, madam, thatin the company assembled in your genteel drawing-room,who bow here and there and smirk in white neck-cloths,you receive men who elbow through life successfullyenough, but who are ogres in private: men wicked, false,rapacious, flattering; cruel hectors at home, smilingcourtiers abroad; causing wives, children, servants, parents,to tremble before them, and smiling and bowingas they bid strangers welcome into their castles. I say,there are men who have crunched the bones of victimafter victim; in whose closets lie skeletons picked frightfullyclean. When these ogres come out into the world,you don’t suppose they show their knives, and theirgreat teeth? A neat simple white neck-cloth, a merry137