On Life at Home
This issue centers around common issues that parents face at home and in their marriage. We also deal with some topics that no one thinks about, but are of incredible importance! Interviews include Neverclaim, Matt Price, Hugh Halter, and Finding Favor.
This issue centers around common issues that parents face at home and in their marriage. We also deal with some topics that no one thinks about, but are of incredible importance!
Interviews include Neverclaim, Matt Price, Hugh Halter, and Finding Favor.
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If you thought you were p<strong>at</strong>ient<br />
and understanding, loving and<br />
knowledgeable; becoming a<br />
parent brings a level of humility<br />
you never dreamed possible.<br />
If you thought you had faith<br />
before, you find yourself on<br />
your knees more than ever as<br />
you pray for your child’s health,<br />
school, growth, friends, protection,<br />
salv<strong>at</strong>ion, strength, perseverance,<br />
faith, future, spouse,<br />
finances, wisdom… children...<br />
and on to every gener<strong>at</strong>ion after<br />
till the day you are standing<br />
before the Lord once again.<br />
With all this in mind, it might<br />
seem r<strong>at</strong>her overwhelming; but<br />
the key to being a “hands-on”<br />
parent isn’t as complic<strong>at</strong>ed as<br />
one might think. It’s not about<br />
hovering or filling our child’s day<br />
with endless activities. It’s not<br />
about micro-managing or losing<br />
our own identity in an effort to<br />
take on the role of God for our<br />
children.<br />
Being a hands-on parent is<br />
simply about leading by example;<br />
putting God first and letting<br />
your kids see it. Set boundaries<br />
and consequences; but be reasonable<br />
and pick your b<strong>at</strong>tles.<br />
Not everything has to be a fight.<br />
Show them it’s ok to be imperfect.<br />
Admit your mistakes and<br />
be humble enough to admit you<br />
need Him.<br />
Be honest and open about the<br />
lessons God has taught you.<br />
You’ll be amazed <strong>at</strong> how open<br />
your child will be with you if you<br />
are open with them. Don’t allow<br />
yourself to be shocked or upset<br />
by anything they confide in you.<br />
When they confide in you, find a<br />
lesson th<strong>at</strong> God has taught you<br />
in your own life. You are there<br />
to teach them how to trust God<br />
to help them navig<strong>at</strong>e through<br />
life – mistakes and all. There’s<br />
no better way to do th<strong>at</strong> than to<br />
show them you’ve made mistakes<br />
too.<br />
Pray, pray, pray for your children.<br />
I suggest buying the book<br />
“The Power of a Praying Parent”<br />
by Stormie Omartian and “The<br />
Secret Power of Speaking God’s<br />
Word” by Joyce Meyer. As a<br />
parent, our prayers have power;<br />
and wh<strong>at</strong> we pray over our children<br />
will follow them long after<br />
we have gone to be with the<br />
Lord.<br />
Understand th<strong>at</strong> your child is<br />
not a copy of you. They were<br />
not placed on this earth for us to<br />
relive our lives, the way we wish<br />
we had, through them. God has<br />
a different calling for each of our<br />
children (1Corinthians 12:17-<br />
19). We need to seek Him for the<br />
purpose, in which HE designed<br />
them for, and encourage them to<br />
walk in it; not try to mold them<br />
into wh<strong>at</strong> WE think they should<br />
be.<br />
Finally, give yourself a break.<br />
Give yourself permission to<br />
not be perfect and stand in the<br />
knowledge th<strong>at</strong> HE will teach<br />
your children (Isaiah 54:13). The<br />
role He has entrusted us with is<br />
a vital role; but we are just part<br />
of His lesson plan. Where we fall<br />
short, God’s got our back.<br />
And, if you’ve missed time in<br />
their lives, don’t let any more<br />
time pass. Start now; and be<br />
confident in the fact th<strong>at</strong> God<br />
promises He will restore the<br />
years the locusts have e<strong>at</strong>en<br />
(Joel 2:25). Th<strong>at</strong> includes time<br />
lost if you don’t have primary<br />
custody. Even if the other parent<br />
is doing a gre<strong>at</strong> job, you m<strong>at</strong>ter<br />
in the lives of your children. They<br />
need you; and God’s power, to<br />
multiply the effect of your time<br />
with them, trumps any visit<strong>at</strong>ion<br />
schedule.<br />
In all of this, remember - being<br />
a parent (or parental figure) is<br />
not about the rewards you will<br />
receive. When you are entrusted<br />
with th<strong>at</strong> precious assignment,<br />
you sacrifice everything you<br />
thought you were, to be wh<strong>at</strong><br />
someone else needs you to be.<br />
Sometimes you will succeed.<br />
Sometimes you will fail. Sometimes<br />
you are blessed with<br />
amazing rewards. Sometimes<br />
you wonder if you had any effect<br />
<strong>at</strong> all. But, in every moment,<br />
you will find God by your side;<br />
ready to help you “run and not<br />
grow weary, walk and not faint”.<br />
Yes, you will find Him right there<br />
through it all; bringing with Him a<br />
promise…<br />
“Train up a child in the Way they<br />
SHOULD go; and, when they<br />
are old, they will not depart from<br />
it.” ~Proverbs 22:6<br />
Biography<br />
He<strong>at</strong>her Bolinger is a devoted<br />
daughter of God; a wife, mother<br />
of 3, step-mother of 2, writer,<br />
bible teacher, public speaker<br />
and co-founder (with her wonderful<br />
husband) of Single Hope<br />
Ministries for single parents. Her<br />
passion, calling and focus are<br />
to be God’s vessel to minister<br />
to the broken hearted, provide<br />
direction to the lost and bring<br />
hope to the hopeless.<br />
To connect with He<strong>at</strong>her<br />
:www.facebook.com/foreverchanged1Sam106
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