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108 The Gospel in Dostoyevskymy lace collars. Lizaveta, the pedlar, sold me some collars andcuffs cheap – pretty, new, embroidered ones. Katerina lvanovnaliked them very much; she put them on and looked at herself inthe glass and was delighted with them. ‘Make me a present ofthem, Sonia,’ she said, ‘please do. Please do!’ She wanted them somuch. And when could she wear them? They just reminded herof her old happy days. She looked at herself in the glass, admiredherself, and she has no nice clothes at all, nothing like that of herown, hasn’t had all these years! And she never asks anyone foranything; she is proud, she’d sooner give away everything. Andthese she asked for, she liked them so much. And I didn’t wantto give them. ‘What use are they to you, Katerina Ivanovna?’ Isaid. I spoke like that to her; I ought not to have said that! Shegave me such a look. And she was so grieved, so grieved at myrefusing her. And it was so sad to see…And she was not grievedfor the collars but for my refusing, I saw that. Ah, if only I couldbring it all back, change it, take back those words! Ah, if I…butit’s nothing to you!”“Did you know Lizaveta, the pedlar?”“Yes…Did you know her?” Sonia asked with some surprise.“Katerina Ivanovna has consumption, rapid consumption; shewill soon die,” said Raskolnikov after a pause, without answeringher question.“Oh, no, no, no!”And Sonia unconsciously clutched both his hands, as thoughimploring that she should not die.“But it will be better if she dies.”“No, not better, not at all better!” Sonia unconsciouslyrepeated, frightened, and not considering her words.“And the children? What can you do except take them to livewith you?”