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From the Life of the Elder Zossima 173“You are, I see, a man of great strength of character,” he said,“as you have dared to serve the truth, even when by doing so yourisked incurring the contempt of all.”“Your praise is perhaps excessive,” I replied.“No, it’s not excessive,” he answered. “Believe me, such acourse of action is far more difficult than you think. It is thatwhich has impressed me, and it is only on that account that Ihave come to you,” he continued. “Tell me, please, that is if youare not annoyed by my unseemly curiosity, what your exact sensationswere, if you can recall them, at the moment when youmade up your mind to ask forgiveness at the duel. Do not thinkmy request frivolous; on the contrary, in asking the question Ihave a secret motive of my own, which I will perhaps explain toyou later on if it is God’s will that we should become more intimatelyacquainted.”All the while he was speaking, I was looking him straight inthe face, and I felt all at once a complete trust in him and greatcuriosity on my side also, for I felt that there was some strangesecret in his soul.“You ask what were my exact sensations at the moment whenI asked my opponent’s forgiveness,” I answered. “But I had bettertell you from the beginning what I have not yet told anyone else.”And I described all that had passed between Afanasy and me andhow I had bowed down to the ground at his feet. “From that youcan see for yourself,” I concluded, “that at the time of the duel itwas easier for me, for I had made a beginning already at home,and when once I had started on the road, to go further alongit was far from being difficult but became a source of joy andhappiness.”I liked the way he looked at me as he listened. “All that,” he said,“is exceedingly interesting. I will come to see you again and again.”