Unveiling a fragile spirituality: Experiences of connectedness in pediatric palliative care

118 Chapter 6
FRAGILE SPIRITUALITY AS A DIMENSION OF LIFE
ITSELF
This fragile type of spirituality brings together ordinary and extraordinary aspects of
life-events. The concrete event that has special meaning to whom it concerns, becomes
a transcending experience as it discloses another dimension in life itself. For many
people transcending experiences activate renewed reflections on life and the personal
authentic identity and purpose in life (Weiher, 2014).
Reflections on the remaining connectedness with the deceased do not necessarily
indicate belief in another reality where the loved one resides, separated from our reality,
as other research suggests (Klass, 1999; Körver, 2013). In many cases the existence of
such a place is denied or considered to be of no importance. People who do not believe
in a hereafter or heaven may still relate of strange events that somehow connect them
to what is lost, leaving them with a sense of wonder (Falkenburg et al., 2019). Henning
Luther, who rejected the dichotomic vision on religion as based on the assumption of
two distinct realities, emphasized that transcendence does not mean “the closed-off area
of a world beyond, but the transgression of the borders of the familiar” (Luther, 1992, p. 58). 1
In fragile spirituality, experiences open up to a transcending dimension within reality, in
this time and space. A lasting relationship is felt with the person who is no longer part of
this world but is not necessarily residing in another reality.
The same emphasis on life is reflected in research on how ‘the higher dimension’ is encountered
in the modern society of the Netherlands (Van den Brink, 2012). This higher
dimension was once specifically represented in the domain of the sacred, in its focus
on the divine, God and higher powers. Over time it manifested itself increasingly in a
social order with social engagement and nowadays in a vital dimension in which the
body, nature, and the biological are highly valued. The higher dimension encountered
in transcending experiences of connectedness, belongs more to this vital dimension
than to the sacred sphere. The transcending notion is part of life itself. The experience is
more connected to the vision on life than to the vision on the divine. Life itself opens up
to both immanent and transcendent dimensions. Bodily, environmental and existential
or spiritual aspects are all important. There are transcending possibilities, however
illogical, behind the facts of life. The expression: ‘There is more between heaven and
1 “Transzendenz meint nicht den abgeschlossenen Bereich des Jenseits, sondern die Űberschreitung über die
Grenzen des Vertrauten hinaus.”