Hyouka - Volume 03 - The Kudryavka Sequence - Welcome to KANYA FESTA! (1)

Once she began, Irisu-san showed no sign of stopping,
"Unless I'm mistaken, I always knew you are the type to not want to rely on
the help of others.
"Yet, I don't think you should go on manipulating expectations of other
people like that. With the way way you spoke and demeanor you put on, it
makes you sound very dependent. While it's a very effective way to give
someone the illusion that they're reliable. Yet it's risky for you to go on like
that, not just in the long term, but in the short term as well,"
She gave a very serious advice.
She was right. I realized I was very uncomfortable with myself after that
radio broadcast. During that time, or rather, during these three days, I
wondered if I was being too dependent on other people.
Maybe I was too conscious of my relationship with Oreki-san. Anxiously
aware that I was constantly making him do the explanation on things I don't
understand, without even trying to figure it out myself.
However.
To rely on this many people, and to get some deal out of them was, how
should I say this? ...... Yes, to quote from Oreki-san, this goes against my
personal creed.
I think it's problematic to rely on someone else to solve one's own problems.
While it is true that the Classics Club was unable to sell all the anthologies on
its own, but I'm not used to such a solution. I was unable to distinguish
between 'expectation' and 'reliance'. Could my fatigue last night be related to
such anxieties?
With some trepidation, I asked,
"Did I really sound that dependent?"
Irusu-san raised her hand to the side of her face, and lifted her little finger.