A Judge’s Guide

RECURRING ISSUES
relevant events.” 99 Two commentators have proposed comparing the gathered
facts against the following 13 points:
Level of physical danger to the mother.
History of physical abuse towards the children.
History of sexual abuse or boundary violations towards the children.
Level of psychological cruelty to the mother or the children.
Level of coercive or manipulative control exercised during the
relationship.
Level of entitlement and self-centeredness.
History of using the children as weapons, and of undermining the
mother’s parenting.
History of placing the children at physical or emotional risk while
abusing their mother.
History of neglectful or severely under involved parenting.
Refusal to accept the end of the relationship, or to accept the mother’s
decision to begin a new relationship.
Level of risk to abduct the children.
Substance abuse history.
Mental health history. 100
You must also consider whether the child has been the direct victim of domestic
violence, 101 has witnessed violence, or has been exposed to it, i.e., is living in a
home where violence is taking place even if he or she has not actually seen or
heard it. A thorough assessment is critical; the failure to accurately assess the risk
to children can result in a custody decision that exposes children to additional
violence.
Domestic Violence and Child Custody Disputes
A significant percentage of contested custody cases are in families where domestic
violence occurs. Patterns of domestic violence often begin, persist, or escalate
during child custody battles, as the most dangerous time for a victim of domestic
violence is when she leaves her abuser. 102 National studies show that a separated
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