Sleeping-with-ROCD

would do. I only told her I must've eaten something bad.
Any mistake or misbehavior was often met with excessive
punishment. This included holding dictionaries on outstretched
hands until the pain in my arms became unbearable.
If my arms dropped, this was also met with punishment.
Another was kneeling on uncooked rice which occasionally
resulted in bleeding sores on my knees. There was
significant corporal punishment, such as spanking with a
belt, wooden spoon, or his hand. I was punched a few times,
and strangled once. It was common to go without a meal or
two.
In looking back, I realize that this was abuse. I can also
see how this affected my sense of self-worth, social development,
and many other things. In his view, locking me in my
room was part of his military standards of reform. I was in
isolation. I was taught that mistakes and failure to adhere
to his strict structure would be met with severe consequences.
I was once removed from my home by child protective
services, when teachers from my school recognized strange
behavior, which resulted in the nurse checking me and finding
bruises on my body.
It may be hard for people with no experience with child
abuse to understand this, but at the time, I saw nothing
wrong with what was happening to me. I thought this was
how everyone was raised.
Although my mother eventually caught onto his abuse,
and subsequently left him, the effects of my environment
stayed, and developed into a variety of disorders. I was di-
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