Sleeping-with-ROCD

They want to help, so they give you advice. Unfortunately,
their advice comes from their knowledge of normal circumstances
or those that are handled with logic. ROCD is different,
therefore the strategies for dealing with it should be
as well.
You can tell your loved ones that you are not looking for
advice. This may present them with either relief or frustration,
but it makes it clear that this does not help you. You
also need to clarify what does help.
It helps to just have someone to vent to, who can hear
you, let you cry, and even hold you in silence when you
need it. Release is therapeutic, and getting your frustrations
out of your mind and into the air can bring relief. If your
loved one does respond to you, it should be in a way that is
sympathetic or empathetic, but not in frustration.
It does not help you to have someone else express anger
or frustration toward that which you are committed to
working out. Statements such as “That jerk!” or “I don't
know why you put up with it” are not helpful. Simple remarks,
such as “I'm sorry you are going through this” or “I
hope it gets better soon” are good, supportive words that
you will likely need to hear occasionally.
You have a responsibility in making sure that others are
able to stay supportive. Going to a loved one and complaining
about how mean your partner is acting, or calling him
or her names is not going to work out well if you want support
in keeping the relationship.
How you describe your partner is how your loved ones
will view him or her. Once you have given them the impression
that your partner is a mean person, you will not be
82