The Duchy of Jerald

Oh the mother and child reunion
Is only a moment away
These lyrics in my head today, this A.M. as I awoke.
A yearning in my soul for a nurturing parent, due to a lung cancered father and an unavailable
toxic narcissist mother.
So. An orphan.
So. These feelings come up in times of trouble (apologies to the Beatles) and no mother Mary
comes to me. An old ancient program of a habit of mind that leads to dependence of all kinds. I
should have a parent, I should have family to care for me.
There is no reason why I should anything. I highly prefer to be cared for but I don't have to.
Instead, I've searched the libraries of the world knowledge till I found one simple line of hope,
nurturing, and self care: If it is to be, it's up to me - Albert Ellis. ( www.rebtnetwork.org )
So. The mother and child reunion is me nurturing me. It's only a motion away to reasonably
independent self care. If I need assistance then I need it, like a doctor or a mechanic or a cane
and a walker. I'm not going to make myself crazy over this current event.
There is always some event.
Best to simply accept myself without condition of parents, lovers, and friends who come and
go, because people die; all relationships have a life cycle.
Best to shore up my relationship with me; a lasting caring one that is always with me and will
never leave me.
Then if I yearn for friends, be friendly, if I yearn for love be loving.
Especially to me.