Focus on the Family Magazine - June/July 2020

COUPLES / FOR HER
panic in the
powder room
Face your anxiety so you can
embrace your marriage
BY REBEKAH LYONS
ILLUSTRATION BY DANNY ALLISON
A COUPLE OF YEARS AGO,
my husband, Gabe, and I stayed in
a 1920s house in Carmel, California.
The house was built to last, with
10-inch-thick walls and heavy,
carved wooden doors.
While Gabe was waiting for me in
the nearby village, I used the teenytiny
powder room, and when the
lock jammed, I found myself trapped
inside a concrete bathroom miniprison.
The fear I felt induced the first
panic attack I’d had in seven years.
Even though God provided a way
of escape—I managed to climb out
of an 18-inch-wide, arched window—
the attack left me doubting that I
would ever be brave again in tight
spaces, or with heights and crowds.
Fast forward six months. Gabe
and I set out on a European
adventure to celebrate our 20th
anniversary. This was our chance
to open our hearts to each other in
ways that would deepen our relationship.
We knew that we needed
to be healthy as husband and wife
in order to offer emotional support
to each other and our kids.
While I looked forward to the
adventure with my husband, the
reality that I could have another
panic attack wasn’t far from my
mind. I’d have to squeeze into
small places, mingle with shoulderto-shoulder
crowds on public transportation
and, if I dared to climb a
mountain, be near the edge of high
cliffs. Anxiety threatened to overwhelm
me.
As women, many of us have
some fear that can keep us from
experiencing everything that God
intends for our lives and marriages:
fear that we’re not doing enough;
worry about health, politics, career
choices; anxiety that we can’t keep
up; fear of what other people think.
I’ve learned, however, that with
a little intentionality and a lot of
perserverance, anxiety can be transformed
into peace and purpose.
The command not to fear is listed
more than 100 times in the Bible,
and I took that to heart.
Here are two reminders that
helped me keep anxiety at bay
during this trip.
<strong>Focus</strong> on your purpose
As soon as I boarded the plane for
our long Atlantic flight, I challenged
myself to step inside the lavatory
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FOCUS ON THE FAMILY
June / July 2020