Focus on the Family Magazine - June/July 2020

FAITH & INSPIRATION / PRODIGALS
4 principles for encouraging
faith in your adult children
BY ROB RIENOW
AFTER COLLEGE, Gerry and Jen’s daughter, Melissa,
moved hundreds of miles away. She not only left physically,
but she also “left home” spiritually. She had been raised
Christian and had always attended church, but because of
a series of hurts, poor choices and spiritual battles, she no
longer considered herself a believer. Like many other parents
in this situation, Gerry and Jen were heartbroken and
discouraged. Still, they knew that parenting was a lifelong
mission, and they needed to continue to reach out to their
daughter with God’s love.
They sent Melissa a letter. It was simple. They wanted
her to know, in writing, how much they loved God and
how much they loved her. There was no response, not
even a polite acknowledgment that the letter had arrived.
However, two years later, Melissa found her way back and
embraced a relationship with God. When Melissa eventually
shared her journey with her parents, she told them
that God had used that letter to start the process of turning
her heart back to Jesus.
If you have a son or daughter far from God, it isn’t too
late for your faith to influence your child. As Gerry and Jen
knew, parenting is a lifelong mission. There are four biblical
principles for you to consider as you embrace the
mission of encouraging faith in your adult children.
Offer your
heart to
the Lord
Can we hope to lead a child in a
direction we aren’t going? Consider
Deuteronomy 6:5-7: “Love the Lord
your God with all your heart and
with all your soul and with all your
might. And these words that I command
you today shall be on your
heart. You shall teach them diligently
to your children.”
Parents tend to focus on that final
thought—the command to help
their children follow God. But in the
larger context of these instructions,
God calls us to personally love
Him with all of our heart before He
addresses our parenting.
I believe there are two essential
aspects for parents when it comes
to offering our hearts to the Lord:
personal repentance and praying
diligently for our children. No one is
a perfect parent. We’ve all made (and
continue to make) mistakes. Have
you taken those parenting failures to
the Lord with a spirit of repentance?
The purpose here is not to wallow in
past sins but to receive forgiveness
and freedom through Christ’s work
on the Cross.
Adult kids make their own choices
and will be held accountable for
what they choose. The parent is not
responsible for those choices. But we
also must reject the idea that how we
have lived our lives hasn’t affected
our kids at all. Our lives have a ripple
effect through generations.
Next, when it comes to praying for
your child, I encourage you to focus
your prayers on the spiritual condition
of your son or daughter. It may be
that your son is struggling in his marriage
or your daughter is experiencing
stress at her job. These are important
things to be praying for, but when one
of our children is far from God, the
focus of our prayers should be for the
Holy Spirit to transform our child’s
heart so he or she is drawn into a living
relationship with God through
Jesus (Matthew 6:33). >>>
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FOCUS ON THE FAMILY
June / July 2020