Welcome to The Club v3.3 Summer 2023

Welcome to ...
THE Club
I’d write something better here, but I forgot to!
Welcome to ...
Summer 2023
Drop us a line… we’d love to know what you think!
What a joy it was to receive your colourful copy of “Welcome To The
Club”. I love the size and the look. You’ve kept the best of Daytripping -
fonts, bottom borders, great community content - and added humour
and wisdom geared to seniors and retirees, a demographic which
now includes me.
It would have been easy to portray aging with negative stereotypes,
but instead you have cleverly blended the ability of older folks to laugh
at aging, along with providing healthy, positive images.
What a sensational read. It even makes me interested in exploring
retirement living options in beautiful Sarnia-Lambton.
Thanks, of course, as well for re-publishing my story “Slow Lane”.
I hope your readers got a laugh or two from it.
Congratulations again on “Welcome To The Club” and thank you for
providing such fresh and appealing content.
All the best ~ Vivienne Mathers (a long time Daytripping contributor)
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character of your neighbours and their
The
children. This might be a good letter
for you to simply write in order to
Retirement vent, but then it’s best to tear it up
into small pieces, and place them on
Coach © by Mike Keenan
your neighbour’s lawn. Just kidding.
http://theretirementcoach.libsyn.com/ This sort of letter will antagonize
your neighbours and make you seem
as thoughtless as they are. They may
be going through a rough period.
The Dale They could be ‘Leaf fans. Try to be
more pleasant and make it a win-win
Carnegie
situation.
Now for letter #2 - Dear neighbours,
Listen Technique
to Mike’s podcasts (humour, travel and poetry) at: The Retirement We were Coach: so pleased when you and
http://theretirementcoach.libsyn.com/ His book, ‘Don’t Ever Quit - a Journal of Coping
your lovely family moved in a few
with Crisis & Nourishing Spirit,’ is available in print & electronic format at Amazon:
https://amzn.to/2KBdPWQ
In my podcasts I provide my email years ago. Your children are delightful,
address for those who might have not shy, and thanks to them, we now
personal questions. Today, we will
examine a problem submitted by a
listener as follows:
Dear Retirement Coach,
have acquired a terrific nature path
cut across our lawn that we can use
for shortcuts just like they do. This
also greatly minimizes the lawn care
I’ve admired your sagacious that afflicts us each week.
advice in the past, and need help
with a perplexing matter affecting
my relationship with neighbours.
They are wonderful people, but our
municipal garbage day has become a
nightmare for me because they don’t
fasten their refuse such that it blows
over on our lawn, into our trees and
sometimes finds its way into shrubs
and flowerbeds. I’m tired of picking
up discarded pizza boxes that act
like kites in the wind. At first I was
amused by the items listed on their
discarded Costco receipts. So many
carbohydrates—muffins, bread and
cake and pie. No wonder they have
weight issues, but nonetheless, it has
become tedious. They seem oblivious
to the eyesores that they create for us
and other neighbours. What do you
suggest?
Here is my reply -
Fortunately, I’ve been reading Dale
Carnegie’s “How To Win Friends And
Influence People.” I think I can help. For
example, here are two letters that you
can send to your wayward neighbour.
We will discuss the pros and cons of
each.
Letter #1 - Dear sloppy neighbours,
Were you born in a barn or perhaps
a trailer camp? Your refuse may be
something that you want to share
with the rest of the world, but we do
not enjoy pretending that we are FBI
operatives searching for the top ten
most wanted criminals by grazing
looking through your discarded trash.
By the way, do either of you cook or
is it all fast food at dinner time? Your
kids are also sloppy, the way that they
litter on their somnambulistic way to
and from school. Do you know what
somnambulistic means? No? Look it
up. Oh, I forgot; you probably don’t
know what a dictionary is. Did you
know your little one smokes, and
I’m not talking cigarettes! It’s terrific
that your husband can read, in fact
a surprise, but we are not interested
in your subscription to Playboy
Magazine. I like the pictures, but my
wife thinks they’re disgusting. Please
clean up your act before we call the
health department.
Okay, that was one approach. Here
are some comments:
Dale Carnegie would not recommend
letter number one. While direct and
informative, it makes several negative
We really appreciate your efforts
to help lower our municipal tax
assessment in such creative ways
that we had not contemplated before.
Probably, the more dilapidated a place
looks, the less people should have
to pay the taxman. Nonetheless, we
wonder if you would help us to make
each day an “Earth Day” to honour that
great environmentalist, P. Cola, whose
product you seem to enjoy drinking in
vast quantities. Did you know that you
can get rebates for those containers
rather than letting them blow away?
Also, they make great bird-feeders.
As for your vast array of pizza
boxes that drift our way, the boys
can make really neat cut-outs with
the cardboard. Rather than using
our windows as targets when your
children play ball hockey, they could
fashion bull’s eyes from the pizza
boxes and attach them to the bumpers
on your cars.
We welcome your suggestions (other
than moving out, of course) on how to
make this the best neighbourhood in
town.
Now for the comments on letter #2:
This is your classic Dale Carnegie type
letter. Notice all of the compliments that
will make the neighbours feel accepted
and appreciated? Even the kids are
praised, and this will inspire them to act
accordingly. Also, there are no threats
or abusive language. This letter works
best because it offers suggestions,
teamwork and creative solutions to a
vexing problem.
I know, most people would probably
opt for letter number 1, but I personally
think the Dale Carnegie suggestions
in letter number 2 will have a greater
impact. If that doesn’t work, this more
inventive approach might work. First,
book a month’s holiday somewhere out
of town. Next, enlist the aid of a local
farmer to drop a full load of manure
on your neighbour’s lawn. They will
get the message. When you get back,
apologize for the mistake, and get all of
the neighbours to take manure for their
gardens. A win-win scenario. Everyone
will love you, even Dale Carnegie.
Listen to Mike’s podcasts (humour,
travel and poetry) at: The Retirement
Coach: http://theretirementcoach.libsyn.
com/ His book, ‘Don’t Ever Quit - a Journal
of Coping with Crisis & Nourishing Spirit,’
is available in print & electronic format at
value judgments concerning the Amazon: https://amzn.to/2KBdPWQ
P A G E 22 “Magic Mirror on the wall, who’s the fairest one of all?” -Snow White & the Seven Dwarfs, 1937