SandScript 2023 [Digital Exclusive]

common his life is but he’s pretty sure it isn’t normal.
He can look at his friends and see their personalities and styles. He can see that they’re the closest
to themselves they can be at this age. Jaiden on the other hand, he’s in a t-shirt he got for a dollar
at a thrift store two years back. The color is no longer discernable due to its use. There’s a shoddy
stitch job right at the armpit because fixing his clothes is a lot better than having to thrift new ones.
He actually doesn’t mind thrifting, but he can’t do it as often as he should.
Jaiden doesn’t know who he is, or what his personality is. Jack is fourteen, meaning he doesn’t
need Jaiden as much anymore. That should be a relief but it isn’t because now Jaiden realizes
that if he stays like this, all of his siblings will have grown up and he’d still be here. Nothing to
show, no ambition, just Jaiden.
But he can’t leave. His parents work long hours to pay for their kids and they can’t afford a
babysitter. Jaiden’s that person and he isn’t much beyond that. Maybe that’s what’s keeping
him up, maybe it’s finally sinking in how awful his lot is right now.
He hears the door open but doesn’t check to see who it is. They sit next to him, utterly silent.
That’s how Jaiden knows it’s Jack. The second of the three J names before his parents gave
up on trying to come up with J names with the fourth kid. Jack is quiet but not like Jaiden
is. Jaiden isn’t sure if his quietness is who he is or if it’s just a byproduct of the relentless,
suffocating, numbness. Jack is quiet because that’s who he is.
He’s been like that for as long as Jaiden can remember. No one else in their family is quite as
quiet. Jaiden hasn’t looked at his brother yet but he can feel that he wants to talk. In being
a pseudo-parent to his siblings, Jaiden is weirdly attuned to them. He almost always knows
exactly what they need or wants before they even ask him.
“What’s up?” Jaiden eventually asks when the breeze stopped and he could no longer mask
the silence with rustling leaves.
“You’re not in bed,” Jack said in his standard matter-of-fact tone. It tells Jaiden nothing but he
understands it all the same.
“Couldn’t sleep.” Jaiden shrugged like it was no big deal.
“I don’t think the others are going to sleep if you’re not in there.” Jack is pulling on the
drawstring of his hoodie. Attempting to even it with the other, he scowls when he realizes he
pulled a bit too far.
Jaiden shares a room with three of his brothers, he’s been out of the room before and they
were fine. “Others?”
Jack nods still fixated on his hoodie. Jack is fourteen, he probably thinks it’s stupid that he’s
kept up because Jaiden isn’t there. Jaiden doesn’t think it’s stupid but telling him that would
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