Digesting Jung: Food for the Journey - Inner City Books

The Puer/Puella Syndrome 101
The individuating puer—one coming to grips with his attitudes
and behavior patterns—knows that undifferentiated feelings are
highly suspect, especially when they arise in conjunction with the
use of alcohol or other drugs. Instead of identifying with his feelings,
he tries to keep some distance from them, which means objectifying
what he is experiencing. He questions himself: Is this what I
really feel? Is this what I want? What are the consequences? Can I
live with them? Can I live with myself? How does what I do affect
others?
Puers generally have a hard time with commitment. They like to
keep their options open and can’t bear to be tied down. They act
spontaneously, with little thought of consequences. The individuating
puer has to sacrifice this rather charming trait—but what he sacrifices
then becomes part of his shadow. In order then not to become
an automaton, ruled by habit and routine, he will have to reassimilate—this
time consciously—his lapsed puer characteristics.
Also symptomatic of puer psychology is the feeling of being
special, of having a unique destiny. When you feel like that, it’s
hard to muster the energy to earn a living. Compared to what you’re
cut out for, the daily grind is just too mundane. This is a variety of
inflation. You feel special, so why, you ask yourself, am I doing
something so ordinary?
If this attitude persists, you can cheerfully rationalize wasting
your life, waiting for destiny to catch up—or fall from the sky. You
play the lotteries and buy stocks. You know the odds are against
you but you cross your fingers and hope you’ll win, and you hedge
your bets with options and silver futures.
Puers and puellas live a provisional life. There is always the fear
of being caught in a situation from which it might not be possible to
escape. Their lot is seldom what they really want; they are always
“about to” do something, to make a change; one day they will do
what is necessary—but not just yet. They are awash in a world of
“maybe”: “Maybe I’ll do this . . . maybe I’ll do that . . .” Plans for
the future come to nothing; life slips away in fantasies of what will