Uncle Andy's Digest • August 2020

Honeymoon
Toast
Submitted by Jimbo
One of my daughter’s
wedding presents was
a toaster oven. Soon
after the honeymoon,
she and her husband
tried it out. Almost
immediately, smoke
billowed out of the
toaster.
“Get the owner’s manual!”
my daughter’s
husband shouted.
“I can’t find it anywhere!”
cried my
daughter a short time
later.
“Oops!” came a voice
from the kitchen. “Well,
the toast is fine, but
the owner’s manual’s
burned to a crisp.”
Aye Matey!
Submitted by Steve Simard
A pirate goes to a
dermatologist, worried
that the moles on
his back might be
cancerous.
I got thrown out of the pet store when I asked the cashier how long
before the seed I was buying would grow a bird?
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Remember dad jokes are important. They are a vital part of pop culture.
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Proudly serving the communities of Lewiston and Auburn
for over one hundred years.
The doctor inspects
them and says, “It’s
okay, they’re benign.”
The pirate replied,
“Check ‘em again
matey, I think there be
at least ten!”
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Uncle Andy’s Digest ...with
Jimbo
38 August 2020 783-7039
Why can your car insurance rate go up for reckless driving
but not down for wreckless driving?