UAD September Digest 2021

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Fair PaySubmitted by JimboI just saw a book titled, How To Solve 50% Of Your Problems.So I bought two.An indigent client whohad been injured in anaccident went lookingfor a lawyer to representhim without cost.One lawyer told him thathe would take the caseon contingency.When the client askedwhat the “contingency”was, the lawyer replied,“If I don’t win your lawsuit,I don’t get anything.If I do win your lawsuit,you don’t get anything.”Enjoy Happy HourEvery Monday - Friday from 2p-5p!47 Broad Street, Auburnwww.firehouseauburn.com207-376-4959Check out our SeptemberDrink Special!Deep Eddylime vodkaw/ club soda$7 .50Monday - Saturday 11a-9pThe most vulgar Star Wars character of all time was R2-D2. They beeped out every word he said.Apples & other native fruits & vegetablesBaked goods & much more!Open daily 8am - 6pm207-225-3764 • 174 Auburn Road, Route 4, TurnerMENTION THIS ADfor $25 off of 100 gallons or more!Exp. 9/30/21207-225-300084 General Turner Hill Road, Turner • www.mhoilandpropane.comJust checked my home insurance policy. It turns out that if my quilt is stolen, I’m not covered.DID YOUKNOW?The yellow and orangecolors you see actuallyalways exist in leavesbut they are overpoweredby the abundanceof green fromchlorophyll.The amount of chlorophyllstarts to decreaseas the sun weakensand the days growshorter.Uncle Andy’s Digest ...with32JimboSept. 2021 783-7039YOUR HUNTINGHEADQUARTERS FOR:• Guns• Hunting Gear• Sporting Equipment• Rental Center• Garmin productsJoin us for our Community Days Block Party!September 10th & 11thRefreshments Giveaways Tent Sale186 Sabattus Road, Sabattus • (207) 375-6253Bugs Bunny will no longer accept any files through Google Drive.The only way to send him something is as a Whatsapp doc.Come meetthe crew of
You should never take your dog shopping at the flea market.Come visit us at our NEW home at 368 Minot Ave in Auburn!Whether you’re looking to buy, sell, or build a home, our growingteam works with you every step of the way!Out ‘n About at the7th Annual SummerBlock PartyPhotos courtesy of Lisa BrownA Sea Dogwith a Balloon Dog...let the shenanigansbegin!JonMercierMarkTurnerToniFerraroBrandonCarusoDebMorinLindaDupuisReginaRitchieDustinMallarMasonDupuisLindsayWrightSlugger207.333.6001368 Minot Avenue, Auburn • mainesourcehomes.comVampires are always looking for their necks victim.Out ‘n About at the 7th Annual Summer Block PartyI’m headed to a music lover’s convention and don’t know ifI should take my Pink Cadillac or my Little Red Corvette.GraceCarpentier,ConnellyJarman,&JaydenLepagewith SluggerExcited tobe able to performagain at theSummer Block Partyfor the second time!We were also herein 2019!Jordyn JohnsonLie to MeBetty LynneRigginUncle Andy’s DigestSept. 2021 UncleAndys.com...withJimbo33
Page 1 and 2: UNCLEANDY’SDIGEST SINCESEPTEMBER2
Page 3 and 4: If a plant is sad, do other plants
Page 5 and 6: Why must I prove that I am me to pa
Page 7 and 8: Steve thought he was a smart indivi
Page 9 and 10: HAS IT ALLYour one-stop shop for:
Page 11 and 12: MAINE’S #1 STEAKHOUSEShown here:C
Page 13 and 14: Mashed potatoes is just Irish guaca
Page 15 and 16: It amazes me how much “exercise
Page 17 and 18: 2My neighbor’s in the Guinness Bo
Page 19 and 20: CAREER OPPORTUNITIESNowHiringOut
Page 21 and 22: Shout out to ATM Fees for making me
Page 23 and 24: When people tell me I’m going to
Page 25 and 26: I accidentally handed my wife a glu
Page 27 and 28: I told my daughter that she had to
Page 29 and 30: I pulled a muscle digging for gold.
Page 31: If dentists make all their money fr
Page 35 and 36: When I was young, I was poor. But a
Page 37 and 38: The fact that my entire body cracks
Page 39 and 40: Cosmetic surgery used to be somethi
Page 41 and 42: Make yourreservationnow!Gymnasts do
Page 43 and 44: The deer had to get braces because
Page 45 and 46: CALL THE PROSLocated in thebuilding
Page 47 and 48: AUBURN4 5 M I N O T A V E N U E 7 8

UAD September Digest 2021

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