Vanity. Ares

society, meant that I should refrain from using the
pronoun ‘he’ in regards to Myra. Although, by that
time, it had actually been corroborated, that in fact
Myra had been born a man, called Winslow,
Connor kept telling me that I should not refer to
him in such a way. For this point I felt angry and
that perhaps I would get a different Lawyer. I held
that the fact that Myra was a man was THE
cornerstone of my case and my truth, hence my
refusal to refer to him in such a way. Connor was
stressed by this and kept puffing his cheeks and
saying: “If you look homophobic or hateful, it will
harm your case Ares. It really will.” I remember
sighing a sigh for the universe’s sickening ozone
layer of politics, pollution and masks. I told my
Lawyer to instigate a better defence. I thought a
better lawyer could probably have helped the
procedures, but I suppressed such thoughts at
those times.
I was to be re-interviewed and it was
Thursday. I remember at that time I held that any
time away from the cell was usually welcomed, as
most of the day was spent standing, sitting,
wondering about what I was wondering about, and
then I would usually think about how I would have
liked to have spent the day. Mostly, I day and night
dreamed, as they both converged, about just doing
mundane things: ironing, sitting on a bus, eating
meat or taking a stroll down a sunny City street. I
tried to make a heaven out of my hell, in my mind,
but from that first night, hell mostly persisted, as
my dreams were overtaken by recurring nightmares
and my desires were suppressed and unable to off-
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA
72