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30 At the Back of the Black Man's Mind By R. E. Dennett
counterpane, 1 hat, 100 longs to mother's relations, and a present of 50 longs to the
bride.
Certain families may not intermarry, as those of Xibanga and Maluango. Intertribal
marriages were once totally prohibited, but to-day marriages take place although the
offspring of such unions are looked upon much in the same prejudiced light by the Bavili
as the offspring of black and white races are looked upon by the Europeans.
A woman who cannot plant is not allowed by her parents to marry. A known fool will
not be accepted, and sickness is a bar. The goods bestowed on the parents of the
proposed wife are called goods for marriage, Bindele Bi Kukwela, and not goods for
barter, nor can the marriage be properly termed a marriage by purchase. The goods are
accepted as a gage, or pledge, not as purchase money.
The "Bundle" having been given to the assenting parents, when the time comes or the
girl arrives at the age of puberty, the bridegroom sends money to the parents so that the
girl may be placed in the "paint house," where she undergoes certain rites of
purification. The father's women folk then take the girl to the water and the Tukula or
red paint is beaten off her with pliant switches or twigs. Then she is dressed and
adorned with leg and arm rings of brass, necklaces of coral and other ornaments and
taken to the expectant bridegroom. The dancing and singing that has commenced after
the washing maybe continued during the whole night. The husband gives certain
presents to the father's relations who have brought him his bride. The next morning the
husband presents his wife with a white handkerchief. Then the women again come and
present the couple with food. The husband makes them a return present and the bride
returns to her father's house. The husband then sends his father and mother to his
father-in-law with a present to ask him to send him his wife. The father-in-law marks a
day for her return to her husband, and gives certain presents to the father and mother
of the husband, who return to their village. Upon the day mentioned the father-in-law
takes his daughter back to his son-in-law with a present. Then in the presence of the
husband's father and mother he exhorts him to follow in his good father's footsteps,
then turning to his daughter he gives her good advice and hands her over finally to her
husband.
The married couple now. have two fathers and two mothers to whom they owe
obedience and whom they must treat equally as members of one family, helping them
all as children are expected to help their parents.
Should the woman be guilty of adultery the man may forgive his wife the first offence,
but on the second occasion he will return her to her father, who must return the "
pledge " money given to him. Should he discover the guilty man he may ask what
indemnity he likes, and that man has to pay the fine even if he has to pawn himself as a
hostage. The first time the husband is caught by the wife he may be forgiven, but the
next time the wife reports the matter to her husband's parents, and the man must pay.
She may leave him for a time, but generally comes back to him. If not, and should it
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