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A Life in the Day of Nixdown Nixon - The Woody Back to School Unit

A Life in the Day of Nixdown Nixon - The Woody Back to School Unit

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65<br />

With<strong>in</strong> m<strong>in</strong>utes Rosemary <strong>to</strong>tters out from <strong>the</strong><br />

kitchen area. Her pretty moon-face is flushed and she<br />

looks slightly shell-shocked. She is dressed <strong>in</strong> an<br />

electric p<strong>in</strong>k chef’s blouson, black cargo baggies and a<br />

match<strong>in</strong>g beanie.<br />

“I hate that fuck<strong>in</strong>g spatula,” she mutters.<br />

“Let me guess, you were late for kitchen duty<br />

because you were on-l<strong>in</strong>e gabb<strong>in</strong>g with <strong>the</strong> Foxyone,”<br />

I observe.<br />

She just nods and wriggles over <strong>to</strong> a tray full<br />

<strong>of</strong> used beakers that need <strong>to</strong> be put <strong>in</strong> <strong>the</strong> dishwasher.<br />

Dotty Hammell is <strong>the</strong> Dame <strong>in</strong> Charge <strong>of</strong><br />

Gastronomic Affairs. She is an absolute dote and very<br />

m<strong>in</strong>x-friendly. However <strong>the</strong> one th<strong>in</strong>g that she will not<br />

<strong>to</strong>lerate is tardy-timekeep<strong>in</strong>g.<br />

Rosemary is one <strong>of</strong> <strong>the</strong> most disorganized gals<br />

that I have ever met and her <strong>in</strong>ability <strong>to</strong> ma<strong>in</strong>ta<strong>in</strong><br />

schedules has played merry hell with her bumbags <strong>in</strong><br />

<strong>the</strong> past. Her natural <strong>in</strong>cl<strong>in</strong>ation for leav<strong>in</strong>g th<strong>in</strong>gs <strong>to</strong><br />

<strong>the</strong> last m<strong>in</strong>ute has not been improved by <strong>the</strong> added<br />

distraction <strong>of</strong> her on-l<strong>in</strong>e affair with her cyber-lothario<br />

who operates under <strong>the</strong> nickname <strong>of</strong> <strong>the</strong> Silver Fox.<br />

Rosemary wriggles back <strong>to</strong>wards <strong>the</strong> kitchen<br />

carry<strong>in</strong>g her load. I have no doubt that she is <strong>in</strong><br />

considerable discomfort. <strong>The</strong> wooden spatula was<br />

first <strong>in</strong>troduced dur<strong>in</strong>g Wooden Saturday dur<strong>in</strong>g <strong>the</strong><br />

Great Spank-<strong>of</strong>f and proved <strong>to</strong> be <strong>the</strong> Achilles heel <strong>of</strong><br />

some <strong>of</strong> <strong>the</strong> <strong>Unit</strong>’s most whop-hardened veterans.<br />

<strong>The</strong> broad flat head packs an <strong>in</strong>credible amount <strong>of</strong><br />

smart and st<strong>in</strong>g.

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