USA First Lady Dr. Jill Biden and Second Gentleman Doug Emhoff

Dear Governor Maura Healey,
On July 9, 2020, my whole world stopped, and my heart will be forever broken. My
youngest son Matt (forever 24,) died from a “toxic” combination of Ativan, crack
cocaine, and fentanyl that I am 99% sure he thought he was given heroin. I have 3
sons; my oldest son is also a recovering addict. He was the one who found Matt and
did all he could do but it was too late.
When I began this awful, relentless journey I, like every other Mom, had hope that with
the right help they could recover and live a happy normal life. I was sadly mistaken, my
son among MANY others are treated like dirt from doctors, nurses, and recovery
facilities who are supposed to be there to help. Insurance companies dictate the
amount of time that is appropriate, what they’ll cover and what they won’t, etc. Matt
was one that could do anything, fix cars, hang drywall, plaster, electrical and plumbing.
He had so much to look forward to, but most of all he wanted his own family and to be a
dad. The stigma that surrounds addiction is frustrating and sad, NO ONE is immune to
this disease. Everyone knows someone, if you don’t, you’re lucky!
A friend of mine and I went to a bridal shower, we sat at a table with women we didn’t
know. We came in after this woman started talking, it was about her husband who was
a fire chief. She proceeded to say that all he’s been doing is administering Narcan, and
how aggravating it must be that they end up going back to the same houses over and
over. She then added that it’s a waste of time and money and that there may be
someone out there that truly needs medical attention or there’s a fire but must wait. My
friend kept kicking me under the table and just said let it go. The conversation went on,
come to find out my sons and her nephews all went to the same trade school. One of
her nephews is an electrician, the other a plumber. She then asked me what trade your
boys chose to do… I looked right at her and said 2 of the 3 are addicts. She didn’t know
what to say, except apologize, I got up and walked away. When we went to the
wedding, she came up to me and wanted me to meet her husband. He looked right at
me and said every life is worth saving no matter how many times you must do it, he
then apologized for what his wife had said to me.
I belong to a great group “The Addicts Mom” and because I had 2 addicts, I found
comfort that I wasn’t the only one! I shared my story, gave advice and was a hopeful
cheerleader for so many others. Since Matt died, I now belong to “The Addicts Mom”
Grieving Mom’s group. I became the mom of before Matt died, to the mom after Matt
died. My whole thought process changed, and I was and still am angry. I still go on
“The Addicts Mom” page because of my oldest son, but I am just an onlooker I have no
thoughts or words of encouragement to give. I read the ones that the moms are happy
and hopeful when their child is in recovery, to myself I say, “just wait”. As far as my
oldest son, In my mind it’s become a not “if” but “when”.
489