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lotsa s<strong>to</strong>ries and movies, here’s some really famous ones for you: The One<br />

Ring, The Arc of the Covenant, the Holy Grail, The Five Point Palm Exploding<br />

Heart Technique, The Murder of Laura Palmer, The Maltese Falcon, the<br />

briefcase from Pulp Fiction, the world’s best Egg Salad Recipe, and of course<br />

– Rosebud the Sled.<br />

In game terms, the McGuffin is a kind of currency – for buying the things<br />

that Gold can’t. Don’t get it twisted, cash is king* but no amount of cash is<br />

going <strong>to</strong> buy you things like happiness, a <strong>to</strong>wn named after you, and having<br />

your name become part of the legends.<br />

* In Freedonia, Cash is literally king. Officially, it’s King Cash VIII, 428 th<br />

Monarch of Freedonia, wielder of the dread sword Inflation-bringer and an<br />

unparalleled Magic-Usurer.<br />

SOME EXAMPLE MCGUFFINS<br />

MIGHT GLORY ARCANA WEALTH ROSEBUD<br />

Detailed Maps<br />

of the Enemy<br />

Encampment<br />

A Red Door<br />

Key<br />

The<br />

Legendary<br />

Hamsterlance<br />

Radio Active<br />

Crystals, or<br />

Heavy Water,<br />

or possibly a<br />

Meteorite<br />

Found in a<br />

Volcano<br />

A T-Shirt<br />

emblazoned<br />

with “I<br />

Survived<br />

Castle<br />

Spank”<br />

The Ice<br />

Queen’s<br />

digits<br />

The Dread<br />

Sword<br />

Inflation-<br />

Bringer<br />

Headpiece of<br />

the Staff of<br />

Zorbug<br />

The<br />

Sorcerer’s<br />

Gall-<br />

Bladder<br />

S<strong>to</strong>ne<br />

The Tome<br />

of Eph VII<br />

– the Spell<br />

Checker<br />

The Coin<br />

used <strong>to</strong> call<br />

Cthulhu<br />

The Power<br />

Nine,<br />

including a<br />

Mint Beta<br />

Black<br />

Lettuce<br />

A Hotel on<br />

Baltic<br />

Avenue<br />

A turquoise<br />

and<br />

<strong>to</strong>urmaline<br />

encrusted<br />

combination<br />

goldfish bowl<br />

and teapot<br />

set<br />

The Maltese<br />

Chicken<br />

640 Million in<br />

Bearer Bonds<br />

The Last<br />

Remaining<br />

Slice of your<br />

Grandmama’s<br />

Lemon<br />

Meringue Pie<br />

A Magical<br />

Dresser that<br />

has a secret<br />

portal <strong>to</strong><br />

another world<br />

Second Place<br />

Ribbon and a<br />

set of Steak<br />

Knives<br />

A Smuggler<br />

that owes you<br />

money<br />

encased in a<br />

solid block of<br />

lead<br />

What flavor is that McGuffin?<br />

In <strong>Warhamster</strong> (again, for now – damn tinkering bastards!) there are 5<br />

Flavors of McGuffin*: Might, Arcana, Glory, Wealth, and Rosebud! Since<br />

what the McGuffin actually “is” is irrelevant (or it wouldn’t really be a<br />

McGuffin), what flavor it is becomes important (<strong>to</strong> the players at least).<br />

Parties can “spend” their accumulated McGuffins at the Fate Shop in <strong>to</strong>wn <strong>to</strong><br />

purchase long term goals (that they will usually settle upon during Party<br />

Creation), and each goal has a cost (like 3 Glory and a Rosebud for a statue<br />

erected in your honor in the Town Square, etc.).<br />

For ease of reference, any McGuffin that could be used as a weapon, or be<br />

of real interest <strong>to</strong> warriors and generals would be Might flavored. Wizardly<br />

things, secrets, and ancient prophecies are usually Arcana flavored. Daring<br />

rescues of princesses in distress, feats of derring-do and other obviously<br />

hazardous goals are Glory flavored. Objet d’art, unfenceable loot, huge<br />

tracts of land, and suchlike are Wealth flavored. Rosebud flavor is for deeply<br />

personal things that are otherwise meaningless – they are the McGuffin<br />

flavored McGuffins (a rare taste treat worthy even of King Torg (ALL HAIL<br />

KING TORG!)**.<br />

*Secretly we want <strong>to</strong> eventually have 31 flavors of McGuffin.<br />

**9 th <strong>Level</strong> Apology: Honestly, we couldn’t not slip it in somewhere.<br />

Why is there a Conflict?<br />

We all know that this can’t end well – you’re building an adventure module<br />

by gods! You have a Big Bad. You have a McGuffin. What is the conflict<br />

that brings the Party in<strong>to</strong> odds against the villain? It can be simple – like,<br />

the party wants it. Greed is a powerful conflict inducer. Or, you can get<br />

creative – and see what happens. Let’s say you chose “The King of the<br />

Elflingland’s Daughter” as your McGuffin. Your conflict could be rescuing her<br />

from the Big Bad that kidnapped her (a Hill Giant bandi<strong>to</strong>), trying <strong>to</strong> s<strong>to</strong>p her<br />

marrying the Big Bad (a potion popping Professional <strong>Warhamster</strong> Lancer), or<br />

keeping her from eating the Big Bad (a Vampiric Ham Sandwich). Some<br />

McGuffins have easy built in conflict – Secret Plots need <strong>to</strong> be foiled, Ancient<br />

and Powerful Relics needs <strong>to</strong> be dug up, and Dragon’s only have scales for<br />

forging in<strong>to</strong> Dragonscale armor.<br />

Everybody gets the “raid the dungeon, kill the monsters, take their stuff”<br />

concept – so you don’t really need an original conflict concept, you players<br />

are ready <strong>to</strong> bash, stab, and incinerate the hordes standing between them<br />

and the McGuffin. We have found that coming up with an original concept<br />

will drive the players, and keep them interested – even if the conflict is really

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