PSYCHEDELICS - Sciencemadness.org

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____________________________________________________ Psychedelics
and for the most part each man seemed to be eager to help
the others in their preparations for the voyage of exploration.
After about three months of weekly meetings, all seemed
ready, and the first drug session was held in the conference
room at the antiquated prison hospital.
In two ways the drug session was a disappointment, both
to me and, I feel, also to the inmates. First of all, there was
a good deal of commotion throughout the session. Most
of this was due to the many people, both other inmates and
guards, who frequently peered in through the windows or
even entered the room. This series of intrusions prevented the
men from gaining much momentum in their own explora-
tions, since they were largely at the mercy of whoever en-
tered the room during the course of the day. All of us felt
we had confronted many facets of ourselves during the ses-
sion, but that there had not been the stillness and quiet
necessary to extend an exploration beyond the initial en-
counter. Like Alice and the plum pudding, the introduction
to a spirit conjured up by the drug all too often seemed to
be the sign for its departure. While much of this rapid move-
ment might have taken place under any conditions, many of
us wondered afterward what the session would have been like
if held outdoors, or at least away from the distractions of
other inmates and guards.
The second source of disappointment during the day was
the discovery that there was more hostility and mistrust
among the men than the preparatory sessions had indicated.
At that time, the men had worked co-operatively, brought
together perhaps by their uncertainties about the forthcom-
ing encounter with the drug, perhaps by their eagerness to
behave as Tim and I wanted them to—as co-operating and
mutually trusting human beings. The fact that each inmate
was not taking the drug in the company of those with whom
he felt comfortable produced tensions and seemed to prevent
the kind of exploration and discovery that had been antici-
pated in the planning sessions.
Both these remarks must be modified by the reminder
that the experience was a highly personal one for each man,
and that our follow-up sessions were not of the kind that
permit a full evaluation of what each experienced that day.