MODULE TWO: COUNSELLING - FHI 360 Center for Global Health ...

STAGE 3: Guilt
People may feel guilty after a death for a variety of reasons. They may
replay the period of time before the death over and over again in their
heads while thinking of things that should have been said or done. People
might feel guilty if:
•There was unfinished business between them and the deceased
•There was fight or quarrel right before the person died
•They wished the person dead
•They did not say goodbye properly
STAGE 4: Depression, despair and intense pain
This stage can be the longest and most difficult. People in this stage may
suffer from insomnia (inability to sleep), depression, acute sadness, crying
spells, pangs of longing, loss of appetite and personal feelings of
inadequacy. They may have difficulty functioning on a day-to-day basis
and feel hopeless about their situation. They may miss the person so
much that they lose the desire to live.
STAGE 5: Re-establishment of balance
In this final stage, life begins to return to normal. The pain gradually
lessens, and people recover their desire to live. People regain their
appetite and are able to sleep normally again. They feel that they can say
goodbye to the deceased and cope with their grief. They reintegrate
themselves into their families, work and social lives.
Many people who have gone through the grieving process say that the
most difficult period comes about six months after the death, when others
are no longer sympathetic to their grief and expect them to be healed.
DYING AND AIDS
•Your 25-year old brother has died in a bus accident
•Your 25-year old brother has died of AIDS
The most obvious difference in the two deaths is that the bus accident was
unexpected and the AIDS death was expected. People react quite differently to
unexpected and expected deaths.
In an unexpected death, such as one due to an accident or murder…
•There is incredible shock
•Reality takes longer to sink in and survivors may experience disbelief
Session 9 – Pg. 3