The Common Ground Network for Life and Choice Manual

Appendix 4.1
General Guidelines for Dialogue Facilitation
1. The Facilitator’s Role. The facilitator’s role is to help the group function effectively and
within the ground rules. “Effectively” here means:
• being impartial, in your role, between pro-choice and pro-life participants which
requires not participating in the substantive discussion, being even-handed, and
taking care with the language you use, e.g. pro-life, not anti-choice, pro-choice,
not pro-abortion;
• keeping the conversation focused by offering, and bringing people back to, the
questions for dialogue provided in the workshop design;
• being the timekeeper by both insuring that speaking time is shared and moving
the conversation along within the bounds of the workshop schedule;
• explaining and coaching communication skills that promote dialogue, and
bringing to the group’s attention behavior/speech that you observe inhibiting the
dialogue.
It is important that the facilitator maintains openness to outcome, not injecting, however
indirectly, a result that the facilitator thinks is desirable. The facilitator also models a spirit
of inquiry where questions reflect genuine curiosity. And the facilitator models good
communication skills, both verbal and nonverbal. Finally, because of the subject of this
dialogue, an attitude of caring and empathy is needed.
One practical point: participants will often look at, and talk to, the facilitator to the
exclusion of other participants, particularly when the facilitator poses the dialogue
questions. Since the goal is to have people in dialogue with one another, try to break this by
looking away from the speaker towards other participants. You may even need to say
something about this (in a light way) and remind people to talk to one another.
2. Active Listening. Active listening is the skill of repeating back to the speaker what he or
she said, being accurate but eliminating any inflammatory adjectives. A goal for the initial
dialogue is to have a participant on the opposite side of the issue do this active listening.
Although this form of communication may seem a little stiff at first, it is especially important
to include it in situations that are polarized. The two sides are so sure they know what each
other is going to say, that often they do not listen, or they listen with such a thick filter, that
only a portion of the message gets through. Active listening can be a key tool in breaking
through the stereotypes and in developing real understanding. It is good for a person on one
side to have the experience of really being heard by someone on the other side; so it is not a
waste of time at all. It is an essential part of the two groups re-learning how to speak with
one another.