Download - The Perfect Wisdom Web

Be Not Afraid GriefSometimes we do this for ourselves, in the hope thatif we can pick ourselves up again and “move on,” wecan limit our pain. Sometimes, worried what otherswill think about us if we don’t pull ourselves togethersoon, we mask our pain by bottling it up silently.Common as it is to try to deal with grief in this way,it does not work. Hide it, talk around it, postpone it,pretend it isn’t there – in the long run, grief will nevergo away until it is met head on and allowed to run itscourse. Given the unique circumstances that shapeevery loss, the time this takes will vary with everyperson. Tragically, time isn’t always granted, as Gina, ayoung woman I know, found out.When Tom, Gina’s sixteen-year-old brother, diedof an overdose several years ago, she was devastated.“In a way, I’m still not through dealing with it,” shesays. Friends and acquaintances were sympathetic atfirst, but after a while they grew tired of her inabilityto “move on” and made her feel guilty that she was stillstruggling:I tried to explain, but they never really understood me. Itseemed like they expected my life to be “normal” again.I often went through times of sadness, bitterness, andother painful emotions, but people were uncomfortablewith this. I was so alone.1