Uncle Andy's Digest - February 2021

More documents

Recommendations

Info

Final ExamsSubmitted by Tyla DavisA college studentstayed up late studyingfor his zoology examthe next day. As heentered the classroom,he saw 10 stands,each with one birdperched on it.The birds heads werecovered with papersacks, and only theirlegs showed.Why do ballerinas have to stand on their tiptoes? Why don’t they just get taller dancers?Moving two milesup the road!10 Memorial Drive,LisbonThe professor announcedthat the testwould consist of lookingat each bird’s legsand determining thebird’s common name,habitat, and genus.The student looked atthe legs, but they alllooked the same tohim. He closely examinedeach bird for whatseemed like hours.The more he looked,the angrier he got.Finally, he marched tohis professor’s deskand exclaimed, “Whata stupid test! Nobodycan tell the differencebetween birds by lookingat their legs!” Thestudent threw his teston the teacher’s desk.The laziest mountain in the world is Mt. Everest.Out ‘n About in the Digest in the 2011 archives.Reminiscing through our 25 years!“Young man! How dareyou behave that wayin my classroom?”the teacher bellowed,“What is your name?”The student liftedup his pant legs andyelled, “You guess,buddy! You guess!”BJ GrondinPrime360Jeff MartinServiceMasterDustin Carrier,Carrier LandscapingUncle Andy’s Digest ...withJimbo38 Feb. 2021 783-7039Muffins spelled backwards is what I do after I take them out of the oven.
Love, like wine,gets better with timeFall head over heels in love with ourimpressive selection of spirits,competitively-priced beer, wine,mixers, and hard-to-find favorites.Stock up at any one of our SIX convenience package storesAuburn545 Minot Avenue - 783-2047301 Main Street 783-9098Lewiston686 Main Street - 344-1200794 Sabattus Street - 783-63531420 Lisbon Street - 333-3095Oxford980 Main Street - 539-6072
Page 1 and 2: UNCLEANDY’SDIGEST SINCECelebratin
Page 3 and 4: Buzz Aldrin was the second man on t
Page 5 and 6: I once highjacked a submarine so I
Page 7 and 8: Two antennae met on a roof, fell in
Page 9 and 10: HAS IT ALLThis specialwas so succes
Page 11 and 12: MAINE’S #1 STEAKHOUSEEVERY MONDAY
Page 13 and 14: CAREER OPPORTUNITIESPRO-TECH REFRIG
Page 15 and 16: The police are arresting me for dow
Page 17 and 18: Do you think when fish get thrown b
Page 19 and 20: Some people think that Simon and Ga
Page 21 and 22: I don’t mean to brag, but cashier
Page 23 and 24: I’m about to lose my job as a tir
Page 25 and 26: OXFORD HILLS AREA BUSINESSESProtect
Page 27 and 28: My son asked to go to the 50 cent c
Page 29 and 30: BUSINESSSP TLIGHTCharles HamelCharl
Page 31 and 32: Apparently, RSVPing to a wedding wi
Page 33 and 34: CALL THE PROSmarcositalian.comOffer
Page 35 and 36: CALL THE PROSYour Valentine Will Lo
Page 37: $75-99,99924.7%$100-124,999 I 11% m

Uncle Andy's Digest - February 2021

Create successful ePaper yourself

Delete template?

Save as template?