_OceanofPDF.com_The_Girl_on_the_Train_-_Paula_Hawkins

ANNA
• • •
SATURDAY, AUGUST 17, 2013
EVENING
I hate myself for crying, it’s so pathetic. But I feel exhausted, these past
few weeks have been so hard on me. And Tom and I have had another
row about—inevitably—Rachel.
It’s been brewing, I suppose. I’ve been torturing myself about the
note, about the fact that he lied to me about them meeting up. I keep
telling myself it’s completely stupid, but I can’t fight the feeling that
there is something going on between them. I’ve been going round and
round: after everything she did to him—to us—how could he? How
could he even contemplate being with her again? I mean, if you look at
the two of us, side by side, there isn’t a man on earth who would pick her
over me. And that’s without even going into all her issues.
But then I think, this happens sometimes, doesn’t it? People you have
a history with, they won’t let you go, and as hard as you might try, you
can’t disentangle yourself, can’t set yourself free. Maybe after a while
you just stop trying.
She came by on Thursday, banging on the door and calling out for
Tom. I was furious, but I didn’t dare open up. Having a child with you
makes you vulnerable, it makes you weak. If I’d been on my own I
would have confronted her, I’d have had no problems sorting her out.
But with Evie here, I just couldn’t risk it. I’ve no idea what she might do.
I know why she came. She was pissed off that I’d talked to the police
about her. I bet she came crying to Tom to tell me to leave her alone. She
left a note—We need to talk, please call me as soon as possible, it’s
important (important underlined three times)—which I threw straight
into the bin. Later, I fished it out and put it in my bedside drawer, along
with the printout of that vicious email she sent and the log I’ve been
keeping of all the calls and all the sightings. The harassment log. My