_OceanofPDF.com_The_Girl_on_the_Train_-_Paula_Hawkins

danger is that I might make myself vulnerable. I still have the trace of an
argument in my head—I may have physical evidence of it on my scalp
and lip. What if this is the man who hurt me? The fact that he smiled and
waved doesn’t mean anything, he could be a psychopath for all I know.
But I can’t see him as a psychopath. I can’t explain it, but I warm to him.
I could contact Scott again. But I need to give him a reason to talk to
me, and I’m worried that whatever I saw will make me look like a
madwoman. He might even think I have something to do with Megan’s
disappearance, he could report me to the police. I could end up in real
trouble.
I could try hypnosis. I’m pretty sure it won’t help me remember
anything, but I’m curious about it anyway. It can’t hurt, can it?
I was still sitting there making notes and going over the news stories
I’d printed out when Cathy came home. She’d been to the cinema with
Damien. She was obviously pleasantly surprised to find me sober, but
she was wary, too, because we haven’t really spoken since the police
came round on Tuesday. I told her that I hadn’t had a drink for three
days, and she gave me a hug.
“I’m so glad you’re getting yourself back to normal!” she chirruped,
as though she knows what my baseline is.
“That thing with the police,” I said, “it was a misunderstanding.
There’s no problem with me and Tom, and I don’t know anything about
that missing girl. You don’t have to worry about it.” She gave me another
hug and made us both a cup of tea. I thought about taking advantage of
the good will I’d engendered and telling her about the job situation, but I
didn’t want to spoil her evening.
She was still in a good mood with me this morning. She hugged me
again as I was getting ready to leave the house.
“I’m so pleased for you, Rach,” she said. “Getting yourself sorted.
You’ve had me worried.” Then she told me that she was going to spend
the weekend at Damien’s, and the first thing I thought was that I’m going
to get home tonight and have a drink without anyone judging me.
EVENING
The bitter tang of quinine, that’s what I love about a cold gin and tonic.
Tonic water should be by Schweppes and it should come out of a glass
bottle, not a plastic one. These premixed things aren’t right at all, but
needs must. I know I shouldn’t be doing this, but I’ve been building up
to it all day. It’s not just the anticipation of solitude, though, it’s the