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Redeeming-Love-By-Francine-Rivers

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R E D E E M I N G L O V E

and looked down at the full box. “Angel, it’s not always easy to accept.” She

closed her eyes and let her breath out slowly. “I had everything planned out

for myself at one time. As soon as I met Steven I knew exactly what I wanted

and what I was going to do. He was handsome and vibrant. He was studying

to be a minister, and he was full of such fire and zeal.” She smiled. “We

were going to go west and spread the gospel to the Indians.” She shook her

head, her eyes filling with pain.

“Did he leave you?”

“In a manner of speaking. He was killed. It was so senseless. He used to

go down to the worst sections of the city and talk to men in the saloons. He

said they needed God more than others more fortunate did. He wasn’t going

to be a rich man’s pastor. Apparently one night a man was being badly beaten

in an alley, and Steven tried to stop it. He was stabbed to death.” Her face

jerked, and she bit her lip.

“I’m sorry, Susanna,” Angel said, feeling her friend’s grief as though it

were her own.

Susanna clenched her hand, tears filled her eyes and slowly trickled

down her pale cheeks. “I blamed God. I was so angry. Why Steven? Why

someone so good, someone with so much to offer? I was even angry at

Steven. Why had he been fool enough to go down to those horrible places?

Why bother with those people? They’d made their choices, hadn’t they?”

She sighed. “It was all such a muddle, my emotions at war. It was no comfort

to me at all to know that Steven was with the Lord. I wanted him with

me.” She was quiet for a long moment. “I still do.”

Angel took her hand and squeezed it. She knew how it felt to long for

someone with your whole being and know he would forever be out of reach.

Susanna looked at her. “You said you weren’t sure what you were supposed

to do from here. Well, we’re both in the same boat.” She smiled again.

“But it’ll come, Angel. I know it will come.”

The top of the box slipped off the bed, and she let go of Angel’s hand to

retrieve it. As she bent over, the box spilled notes all over the floor. Angel

went down on her knees with her to help her gather them together and put

them back in the hatbox. So many slips of papers, so many prayers.

Susanna picked up one and glanced at it. She sat back on her heels and

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