Uncle Andy's Digest - January 2024
The snow has arrived, along with the New Year's January 2024 edition of Uncle Andy's Digest. You'll find the best of what local businesses have to offer, and as always, you'll find great stories, Funny Jokes, Punny Fun, hilarious one-liners, and Fun at our out-and-abouts. Shop local, and find the best central Maine businesses to serve your needs and wants.
The snow has arrived, along with the New Year's January 2024 edition of Uncle Andy's Digest. You'll find the best of what local businesses have to offer, and as always, you'll find great stories, Funny Jokes, Punny Fun, hilarious one-liners, and Fun at our out-and-abouts. Shop local, and find the best central Maine businesses to serve your needs and wants.
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I just don’t want to look back and think, “I could have eaten that.”<br />
THE CHAMPOUX GROUP<br />
CHAMPOUX • PEOPLES • PINKHAM • ROGERS<br />
I N S U R A N C E<br />
...Your Security is Our Concern!<br />
Locally Owned & Operated<br />
Lewiston Str ng<br />
150 East Ave. Lewiston<br />
HOME,<br />
AUTO,<br />
BUSINESS,<br />
AND MORE<br />
207-783-2246 | 888-983-2246<br />
Visit our new location at: 243 Mount Auburn Ave., Suite C, Auburn<br />
If someone asks if you are free tomorrow, respond, “No, I’m expensive.”<br />
Just good cookin’ and plenty of it!<br />
Happy 30th Anniversary!<br />
Our customers<br />
are a source<br />
of inspiration<br />
that makes the<br />
last 30 years<br />
memorable<br />
& successful.<br />
It is with joy<br />
and pride we<br />
thank you &<br />
our staff.<br />
NOW AVAILABLE - ONLINE ORDERING<br />
87 Mill Street, New Auburn<br />
207-753-0171<br />
rollysnewauburn.com<br />
Monday-Saturday: 6a-2p • Closed Sunday<br />
(continued from previous page)<br />
“Yes,” the man at National<br />
Weather Service<br />
again replied, “it’s<br />
going to be a very cold<br />
winter.”<br />
The Chief again went<br />
back to his people and<br />
ordered them to collect<br />
every scrap of firewood<br />
they could find.<br />
Two weeks later the<br />
Chief called the National<br />
Weather Service<br />
again.<br />
“Are you absolutely<br />
sure that the winter is<br />
going to be very cold?”<br />
“Absolutely,” the man<br />
replied. “It’s looking<br />
more and more like it is<br />
going to be one of the<br />
coldest winters ever.”<br />
“How can you be so<br />
sure?” the Chief asked.<br />
The weatherman replied,<br />
“The Indians are<br />
collecting firewood like<br />
crazy.”<br />
Elderly<br />
Advice<br />
Submitted by Pam Ashby<br />
An elderly couple are in<br />
church. The wife leans<br />
over and whispers to<br />
her husband, “I just let<br />
out a long, silent fart.<br />
What should I do?”<br />
The husband replies,<br />
“First off, replace the<br />
batteries in your hearing<br />
aid!”<br />
Envelopes are weird. It’s like, here’s a piece of paper wrapped in another piece of paper<br />
sealed with my saliva.<br />
<strong>Uncle</strong> Andy’s <strong>Digest</strong><br />
<strong>Uncle</strong>Andys.com 17
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