The Adventures of Jonathan Gullible - Bastiat Institute

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Chapter 33 • Doctrinaire
to-shoulder along the walls. Some moaned loudly and held out
arms and legs wrapped with bandages and tied with splints. Others
muttered, paced anxiously, or comforted loved ones. Many people
had bedding and cooking utensils piled next to them, signs of a long
occupation. Jonathan wondered how long these people had to wait.
Dr. Flexner opened an interior door and beckoned to Jonathan.
The crowd immediately stopped all activity and grew hushed. The
occupants stared enviously at Jonathan as he passed by in front of
them. The doctor admitted him to a windowless room fi lled with
desks, clerks, and piles of paper stacked to the ceiling. She guided
him to another door, which led to a small amphitheatre stage, ringed
by a balcony with seats. The powerful odour of chemicals and
decay assaulted Jonathan’s senses.
Scores of observers leaned on the railing of the balcony. Below,
several men and women in white, apparently doctors and nurses,
huddled intently over a bulky patient strapped to a low table.
“To heal this patient,” whispered the doctor sombrely, “orthodox
practitioners cut open veins to let the demons fl ow out with the
blood. On occasion, we apply blood leeches.” She pointed to a table
next to the patient, which held an array of knives, saws, candles,
and bottles of various sizes and shapes. Oozing over the side of a
large metal bowl, slimy leeches, the size of a man’s thumb, writhed.
Jonathan felt his stomach turn.
“Failing that, our men and women of science poison the demons
with chemicals. We prefer to use arsenic, antimony, and compounds
of mercury. What great progress we have made in medical science!
Mark my words, a century from now physicians will marvel at our
achievements.”
“Aren’t those poisons deadly?” said Jonathan. He recalled that
his uncle sold mixtures like these compounds to kill rats back
home. He vaguely remembered hearing old-timers tell of such
dangerous substances used medically in the old days. But hadn’t
those practices ended long ago?
“Can’t be helped,” she said reassuringly. “Cut, draw, and poison
are the only safe and effective treatments.”
“How often does it work?”