The Adventures of Jonathan Gullible - Bastiat Institute

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Chapter 34 • Vice Versa
Jonathan was stymied. Glancing at the name tag under the
man’s badge, Jonathan asked, “What’s your department, ah, Offi cer
Stuart?”
“Immorals,” said the man.
“Beg your pardon?”
“Immorals Department. At our Department we’re concerned
with immoral behaviour.”
“Surely robbery is immoral.” Getting no further response,
Jonathan asked, “Why were those women arrested?”
Offi cer Stuart fi nally looked up from his note-taking and saw
Jonathan’s perplexed look. “Couldn’t you tell by their clothes?
Those women were guilty of giving men sexual favours in
exchange for cash. It would have been much better for them if they
had bartered for those favours instead.”
“Barter? What do you mean by ‘barter’?” asked Jonathan, who
was less concerned about his own troubles at the moment and
increasingly curious about those women.
“I mean,” said the policeman, emphasizing every single word,
“those women should have entertained their associates after
receiving dinner, drinks, dancing, and a theatre ticket instead of
cash. It’s better for community business and perfectly legal.”
This confused Jonathan even more. “So cash must never be used
for sexual favours?”
“There are exceptions, of course. For example, cash may be
paid for the activity if it is fi lmed and shown to all the people in
town. Then it’s a public, not private, event and permitted. Instead of
getting arrested, the participants may even become celebrities and
earn a fortune from a sellout audience.”
“So it’s the trading of cash for purely private sexual activity
that’s immoral?” asked Jonathan.
“There are exceptions for private cash transactions, too, especially
when the women wear nicer clothing than those streetwalkers,”
said Offi cer Stuart with disdain. “Short-term deals, for an hour
or overnight, are illegal. But for a permanent, lifetime contract
between a couple, cash may be used. In fact, parents sometimes
encourage their children to make such deals. Aspirants to nobility
have often been revered for this kind of behaviour. Properly done,