Human Rights at Home and Abroad: Past, Present, and Future

The dynamics between two people in a relationship can be a very delicate balance. Adding
something or taking away something that was once there has the ability to tip the scale dramatically. This
is the case in both romantic and non-romantic relationships. The anxiety, shame and devaluation of
lesbian, gay and bisexual individuals as well as one‘s self is inherent to internalized homophobia and is
most likely to be overtly manifested in interpersonal relationships with other gay, lesbian, or bisexual
individuals (Frost & Meyer, 2009).
At the core of the stigma about being a member of a sexual minority group are the
unsubstantiated ideas that lesbian, gay and bisexual individuals are incapable of intimacy and that they
cannot maintain health, long-term relationships (Meyer & Dean, 1998).
Frost and Meyer (2009) stated that experiencing the feelings of anxiety, shame and devaluation,
internalized homophobia, in the context of sexual or other interactions is likely to decrease the quality and
satisfaction of the relationship. They say that in an effort to avoid these feelings the individual will avoid
deep relationships with other members of their sexual minority group and instead turn to sexual
encounters devoid of emotion. This information can provide a possible explanation as to why this is a
central part of the stigma surrounding sexual minority groups.
Romantic relationships between same-sex individuals are created and maintained in a society full
of stigma and discrimination (Rostosky, Riggle, Gray & Hatton, 2007). Because of this there is naturally
more stress and strain placed on the relationship. As in any couple, hetero- or non-heterosexual, the
partners are interdependent on each other (Rostosky et al., 2007), which means that when there is an
additional stress, internalized homophobia, placed on one of the partners, it has a significant impact on the
other.
In a romantic relationship where either partner of a same-sex couple is experiencing internalized
homophobia, the relationship itself serves as a reminder of one‘s sexual orientation. This can lead to
problems related to ambivalence, conflicts within the relationship, misunderstandings and mismatched
goals for the relationship (Mohr & Fassinges, 2006). These relationship problems are also related to other
previously discussed issues raised by internalized homophobia.
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