The Body Language Project: Dating, Attraction and Sexual ... - Wuala

forward against a bar or on a table with your elbows
and so protecting your chest from exposure.
Another such defensive gesture occurs while sitting
at a table and holding a hand near your face or
playing or talking through a hand. These are all
defensive gestures and should be avoided in order to
properly give a sense that you are comfortable with
yourself.
her again and watch what happens. Next, try
moving a bit closer to her and see if you can get her
to uncross her arms with some subtle eye contact.
Next, cast your eyes toward her as if you are
offering sympathy for whatever bad feelings she is
harboring. The final step will be to open her up
with conversation, perhaps asking her about her day
and getting to the root of the reason for her closed
body positions. See if by using open postures, you
can get her to drop her negative feelings. You might
even try getting her to mirror your positive
gestures.
You may be surprised to find how easy it is to have
people shake their negative feelings and how
flattered they become from the outreach of a
stranger. I can also guarantee that by opening
people up, they will feel more positive and will also
attach these positive feelings to you.
Dave is demonstrating how not to hold your drink.
Holding a drink at your chest is inadvertently showing a
defensive position because it blocks the chest. It is akin to
having your arms crossed. Scarlett’s body language is
basically neutral, but she may be giving off signals of
interest by touching her neck.
CONCLUSION
I have outlined many techniques in this section. At
this point in the book you should feel like a new
person. You should be confident that you have the
potential to be in control of social situations and
have a good sense of women and yourself. You now
know what motivates them and why they are
motivated the way they are. More importantly, you
should be better able to predict their behavior. You
have a valuable set of tools. Use them. Go out and
get what you want, whatever it is.
Dave is now showing the proper way to hold a drink. He
is displaying an open body posture by lowering his drink to
his side. He could also put his drink down every once in a
while or permanently and use his wits to woo his mate.
OPENING PEOPLE
A really great test of your skills is to try to open up
the most closed person in a room or to open up any
person who shows any closed position at all. Find a
woman who appears awkward and closed to the rest
of the room and use your body language to open her
up without using words. For example, a woman
whose legs and arms are crossed will appear cold,
awkward, and disinterested. Try first to send her an
honest and open smile while in conversation with
someone else then lower your gaze when eye
contact is met. Check to see what affect this has.
Perhaps she will marvel at the experience and avert
her gaze downward as well. See if you can catch
The Body Language Project: Dating, Attraction and Sexual Body Language. 1st Edition, 2008. www.BodyLanguageProject.com Page 63