THE INTERNATIONAL - International Indian

[ iNtEr-CaStE MarriaGE ]
Globalisation, Caste
& Arranged Marriages
“Globalisation has done much to expand the understanding of ‘marrying within one’s
own community.’ It has made the arranged marriage options wider, more impressive,
and much more convenient.”
[ By Davita Maharaj ]
Like every girl, I enjoy a good love story.
However, this one was different.
As children growing up in Kerala,
Marcus and Annamma Chacko lived just
five kilometers apart. Their communities
never intermingled. Marcus explains,
“Though we hail from the same place, her
people and my people had nothing much to
do with each other because we belonged to
two different castes.”
They finally met in Uttar Pradesh. Marcus
was a guest singer at a music hall where
Annamma was in the audience. She instantly
felt an affinity to Marcus when he sang in
their mother tongue, Malayalam. After a
three-minute conversation, they parted ways.
Two years later they ran into each other
again while working for the same nonprofit
organization. Though in separate
departments, they couldn’t help but admire
each other’s warmth, energy, and passion
for social justice.
Mutual friends noticed their compatibility and
offered to arrange a marriage, but they resisted.
Marcus recalls, “Elders in the organization
proposed her to me but I told them, that this
will never work as we are both from different
castes.’” Marcus’ leaders promised they would
defend Annamma and Marcus if caste was the
main issue and that they would legally fight
for them, as the Indian constitution allows
inter-caste marriage.”
Not wanting to go against their parents,
Marcus and Annamma Chacko: Marrying outside
their caste communities
Marcus and Annamma waited for familial
support, but to no avail. Annamma’s highcaste
family remained furious at the prospect
of her marriage to a Dalit. Marcus was simply
not an option.
In the end however, Marcus and Annamma
consented to their arranged marriage.
Friends provided food, décor, and beautiful
wedding saris, but the couple recalls, “We had
to struggle through uncertainties, threats and
isolation from immediate family members.”
Through their marriage, Annamma
exchanged her family’s stature and community
for Marcus’ life of humility and simplicity.
By marrying outside of their caste-based
communities the Chacko’s broke a cardinal
imperative of Indian socio-matrimonial
conventions. Namely, whether arranged
by friends as was the Chacko’s marriage, or
arranged by family members as are many
traditional Indian marriages, TIME South Asia
bureau Chief Jyoti Thottam writes that the basic
premise of an arranged marriage is that one
should marry within one’s own community.
The Continued Desirability of Arranged
Marriages
Arranged marriages are still desirable to
many (even westernized) Indians for a
variety of reasons. After surveying over 130
US-based Indian university students in the
spring of 2007, some reasons that particularly
stood out to me were:
1) For the technologically savvy Generations X and
Y, the nayan or matchmaker, is now a machine.
Gone are the days of awkward, stifling,
über-controlled visits with prospective
spouses in their parents’ homes. The ability
to size up candidates is now just a mouse-click
away. The Indian Diaspora has been quick to
catch on to this newfound convenience. The
world’s largest Indian matrimonial website
currently boasts 800,000+ successes. These
are often considered arranged marriages,
since relatives can create the profiles.
2) The process and definition of an “arranged
marriage” has changed.
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THE INTERNATIONAL INDIAN