nl_e17

Report part 4
4. Discussion about Ethics
Paper for the 17 th Ipce Meeting, 2004
By Frans Gieles
Intro
Several years ago, in Copenhagen (1993) and Amsterdam (1994), we discussed ethics. We
developed four principles or guidelines. We took up the thread in Berlin (2001) and in
Rotterdam (2002).
To refresh our memories:
These four guidelines or principles followed by a "PS" were, in a short, recently (i.e. after the
discussion in Rotterdam 2002) revised version:
1. Self-determination:
Children must always have it in his or her own power to regulate their own intimacy,
their relationships with others and their own lives.
2. Initiative:
Even in a later stage of the relationship, it is always the children who make the choice to
initiate intimacy.
3. Freedom:
At any moment within the relationship with an adult, children must have the freedom to
withdraw from the relationship. Love and dedication must be unconditional.
4. Openness:
The child should not have to carry unreasonable secrets. One has to take into
consideration how the child lives with its own sexuality. This openness depends a great
deal on the quality of the relationship, and the support from the adult(s).
P.S.:
The local mores and customs also play a role, as openness about children's intimate lives
is not always appreciated. Children often must have any intimacy in secret.
Homosexuality, for example, is for many youngsters a big taboo. This can bring many
problems and insecurity. If the sub-culture in which they live is relaxed and strong
enough, then children can find support in that environment
These four principles were seen as good in certain situations, but generally too limited and
partly contradictory. The principles speak about avoiding a bad situation, but have no positive
goal or fundamental expression of what is good. The principle of openness, especially, was seen
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