fifty-shades-of-grey

“No. I told you, I don’t sleep with anyone, except you, when you’re stupefied withdrink.” His eyes are reprimanding.My mouth presses in a hard line. This is what I cannot reconcile. Kind, caring Christian,who rescues me from inebriation and holds me gently while I’m throwing up into theazaleas, and the monster who possesses whips and chains in a special room.“Where do you sleep?”“My room is downstairs. Come, you must be hungry.”“Weirdly, I seem to have lost my appetite,” I murmur petulantly.“You must eat, Anastasia,” he admonishes and, taking my hand, leads me back downstairs.Back in the impossibly big room, I am filled with deep trepidation. I am on the edgeof a precipice, and I have to decide whether or not to jump.“I’m fully aware that this is a dark path I’m leading you down, Anastasia, which iswhy I really want you to think about this. You must have some questions,” he says as hewanders into the kitchen area, releasing my hand.I do. But where to start?“You’ve signed your NDA, you can ask me anything you want, and I’ll answer.”I stand at the breakfast bar watching him as he opens the refrigerator and pulls out aplate of different cheeses with two large bunches of green and red grapes. He sets the platedown on the worktop and proceeds to cut up a French baguette.“Sit.” He points to one of the bar stools at the breakfast bar, and I obey his command.If I’m going to do this, I’m going to have to get used to it. I realize he’s been this bossysince I met him.“You mentioned paperwork.”“Yes.”“What paperwork?”“Well, apart from the NDA, a contract saying what we will and won’t do. I need toknow your limits, and you need to know mine. This is consensual, Anastasia.”“And if I don’t want to do this?”“That’s fine,” he says carefully.“But we won’t have any sort of relationship?” I ask.“No.”“Why?”“This is the only sort of relationship I’m interesting in.”“Why?”He shrugs.“It’s the way I am.”“How did you become this way?”“Why is anyone the way they are? That’s kind of hard to answer. Why do some peoplelike cheese and other people hate it? Do you like cheese? Mrs. Jones – my housekeeper– has left this for supper.” He takes some large, white plates from a cupboard and placesone in front of me.We’re talking about cheese… Holy crap.“What are your rules that I have to follow?”