Rich People Problems-Kwan 2017 (WWT)

Lalanne table laden with gold-framed photographs of the sultana posing with famous
personages. Kitty peered at the pictures, recognizing the Queen of England, Pope John
Paul II, Barack and Michelle Obama, Indira Gandhi, and a woman with an enormous pile
of blond hair.
“Who is that blond woman? She looks so familiar. Is she some queen?” Kitty asked.
Oliver squinted at the picture and then let out a quick laugh. “No, but she is adored by
many queens. That’s Dolly Parton.”
“Ah,” Kitty said. Suddenly the double doors opened, and two honor guards in full-dress
uniform entered. Flanking the doorway, they clicked their heels at attention and tapped
the base of their long bayonets on the marble floor twice in unison. “We need to stand,
Kitty,” Oliver suggested. Kitty quickly stood up, smoothing out the wrinkles on the front
of her ankle-length Roksanda skirt and then adjusting her posture.
The guard on the right side shouted sternly, “Sama-sama, maju kehadapan! Pandai
cari pelajaran!” They tapped their bayonets on the floor again, as the sultana swept into
the room in a flaming violet silk kebaya, followed by four attendants. Her head was
covered in a matching violet, blue, and white headscarf, and she resembled Queen Mary,
covered in precious jewels from the waist up. Pinned in the middle of her hijab right
above her forehead was an enormous sunburst diamond brooch with a forty-five-carat
pink diamond in the center. On her ears were a pair of diamond-and-pearl girandole
earrings, and around her neck were what appeared to be ten or twelve heaping necklaces
of nothing but diamonds, diamonds, and more diamonds.
Kitty’s jaw hung open at the sight of this Queen Mother ablaze in diamonds and she
dropped to a curtsy so deep, Oliver thought she was doing the limbo. Oliver bowed
smartly.
“Oliver T’sien, what a pleasure!”
“The pleasure is all mine, ma’am. May I humbly present Mrs. Kitty Bing of Shanghai,
Los Angeles, and Singapore.”
“It’s an honor to be in your beautiful country, Your Majesty,” Kitty blurted out
nervously, before remembering that she wasn’t supposed to speak first.
The Dowager Sultana pursed her lips and stared at Kitty for a brief moment, saying
nothing. She sat down on a throne-like Bergère chair, and Oliver and Kitty took their seats
again. An army of maids entered the room bearing gold-lacquered platters filled with
Malay desserts and steaming pots of tea.
As the maids began serving tea to everyone, the Dowager Sultana smiled at Oliver.
“Come, don’t be shy! I know how much you love ondeh ondeh.”
“You know me too well,” Oliver said, helping himself to one of the bright green ricecake
balls stuffed with palm sugar and rolled in grated coconut.
“Now, what brings you to this neck of the woods today?”
“Well, Kitty has recently become enchanted with Malaysia, so since we were in town, I
thought it only fitting that she meet this country’s greatest living legend.”
The Dowager Sultana beamed. “Oh Oliver, you make me sound like a fossil! Tell me,