Rich People Problems-Kwan 2017 (WWT)

on Jack’s feet, while another walked precariously along his spine as if she were on a
tightrope, grasping an elaborate lattice of poles affixed to the ceiling in order to ensure
the precise amount of body weight on his aching muscles.
“Waaah! That’s it! That’s the spot!” Jack groaned through his face cradle, as the woman
standing on his back dug the ball of her left foot into a muscle below his shoulder blades.
“Looks like someone’s having a good time!” Kitty declared.
“Yea…aahh! Yessss! You’re home!”
“I thought I’d find you waiting to welcome me!”
“When I heard the plane was delayed coming in, I thought I’d…oooooh…get my
massage first!”
“Those stupid French officials delayed our takeoff for two hours because of some idiotic
bomb scare. They wouldn’t even let me onto our plane, so I was stuck in that ghastly
terminal with the public.” Kitty pouted, as she stretched out on the plush chaise lounge
next to Jack.
“I’m so sorry you had to be with the public, babylove. Did you have a good time in
Paris?”
“I sure did! Do you know what happy news I heard while I was there?”
“Owwahhh! Gentle, gentle there! What?”
“You’ll be pleased to know that your daughter is finally getting married,” Kitty said, her
voice dripping with sarcasm.
Jack let out a slow grunt. “Ummm…really?”
“Yes. And to an Englishman. But of course you already knew?”
“How would I? Colette hasn’t spoken to me in almost two years—not since our
wedding.”
“You just don’t seem overly surprised.”
“Why should I be surprised? She was bound to get married at some point.”
“But to an Englishman?”
“Well, Carlton Bao stopped talking to her, and Richie Yang wouldn’t have her, so I think
her options in China became quite limited. What is this fellow’s story?”
“He’s a nobody. Some nonprofit lawyer who’s trying to save the planet. I suppose your
ex-wife will have to support the both of them forever. Do you know what else I heard?
Colette’s wedding gown costs two million dollars.”
“That’s absurd. Is it made of gold?”
“Actually, there are gold chips sewn into it, and it’s encrusted with precious stones. It’s
totally outrageous,” Kitty said, as she sniffed a glass container of body lotion placed on
the side table and began rubbing some on her arms.
“Well, I suppose she can do whatever she wants with her money.”
“But I thought you cut her off completely?”
Jack went silent for a minute, then suddenly groaned. “AWWWWW! Why does that hurt