Saving Fish from Drowning - Heal Burma

AMY TAN
pened. Because of their age difference, Roxanne had treated Heidi
more like a distant niece. But this was the turning point that made
them close as half sisters—as sisters. Roxanne had imagined that
Heidi was nearly murdered as well. She urged her to confide in her,
to let her know if she needed to get counseling or move to another
house. She could even stay with her and Dwight, the younger guy she
was about to marry. But Heidi said she was fine. She had been clear-
eyed and matter-of-fact, surprising even herself. Heidi had always
been sensitive, openly bursting into tears when teased or injured.
After the murder, she became secretive. She felt the murdered man
had given her a sign that she would die soon, too. She forgot what the
sign might have been. Nonetheless, she felt the dread. She was wait­
ing for terror to manifest itself. She tried hard to control it. And in so
doing, she began to prepare for all the terrible ways death might hap­
pen. She knew her precautions were useless. Death would come of its
own accord, and she could not prevent it. Yet she still could not stop
herself from trying, and she hated how she had become, conscious
more of dying than of living.
Taking this trip to China was part of her effort to overcome her
problems. She was determined to throw herself into many unknowns,
face situations she’d ordinarily avoid. She believed she would be
able to handle them, in part because she would be in a completely
different country. The unknowns would prove to be nothing, and
having survived them, she would be stronger and could return home
practiced at pushing aside her phobia. China would be good for her,
really, really good, she told herself.
T HE MEAL HAD TURNED COLD. When the ever-popular Ameri­
can dessert of green-tea ice cream was brought out, the manager of
the restaurant cued his wife and son, and they burst into singing
“Merry Christmas,” to the tune of “Happy Birthday.”
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