DARE-TO-LOVE-TRUTH-AND-DARE-DUET-COLLECTION-by-Lylah-James-pdfarchive

I’m worried the boys will feel left out or unwanted
because I’m so focused on Iris.
I feel ugly and fat. My body is not the same anymore. I
can’t stand to look at myself in the mirror.
I want to go out with the girls. I want to go shopping,
wear makeup, get my hair done… I want to go on a date
with you, but then every time I think about it, I’m filled
with so much guilt and shame, yet I have no idea why.
Then I get angry at myself. Why am I so upset about
such trivial things?
I should be stronger. I should be better. But why am I so
weak?
You won’t understand. No one will understand. Even I
don’t understand what I’m feeling.
Some times, I’m angry at you. I’m jealous of you. How is
that normal? How can I be jealous of my own husband
because he’s the perfect father to our kids?
We’re drifting further apart. I can feel it. Don’t lie to me.
There is a distance between us that wasn’t there before
and I know it’s all my fault.
The clock just ticks and ticks, the days fly by, time never
stops but everything just feels so repetitive. Sometimes it
feels like I’m stuck in a loop, in a separate alternate reality.
And that was how Lila fell asleep. In my arms, her sobs
turning into little wounded whispers. The more she spoke
of her feelings, the more I finally understood what I needed
to do.
Her fingers clutched at my shirt even in her sleep.
“I got you, Little Dragon.”